Reminiscence of a Sengoku Jidai Flower
by ShinjiteruHikari
Summary: Rin, abducted long ago was brought up by the way of the sword in a hidden village of unpredictable killers. Her dormant powers made her an asset for the assassins who took her from Sesshomaru. When a cruel twist of fate makes the two meet after years...
1. Will I see you again?

Hey guys! Basically this story bounces from Sesshie to Rin then Rin to Sesshie yadda yadda. SO this chapter is about how they got seperated when Rin is 12 years old and how Rin joins the village of assasins or ninjas. I wrote a story like this basically because... THERE ARE NO STORIES OF RIN BEING ANGRY AT SESSHIE AND WANTING TO KILL HIM! haha, dont worry, I doubt she will in the future there is a possible pairing but its when Rin is older (yeuurgh, young Rin?). Btw, bloody Naraku is dead and Sesshie and Rin are ahem (were) roaming the western lands searching for more land to conquer (of coarse Rin doesnt know where Sesshie's going cause he never tells her). Enough babble! Read and REVIEW!

Disclaimer (what's it for anyway?): I don't own the fluff and his kid okay?

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_"Cherry blossoms, cherry blossoms,_

_The expanse of the spring sky_

_As far as I can see_

_Is it the fog, or else the clouds?_

_Their smell comes forth._

_Now, now,_

_Let's go look at them!"_

A cluster of villages dotted the horizon as an unusual group traveled along the dirt trail which sprouted an unusual amount of hamanasu (Japanese rose) meaning that it was a path less traveled by. Their sweet scent wafted through the air, dancing around the noses of the travelers. Jaken hated it, Rin loved it, Ah-Un seemed calmed by it and Sesshomaru was irked by their innocent presence.

The sky was painted blue with clouds dotting the horizon every now and then and the sun was merely a distant blaring mark. Rin wondered why she liked the season of spring. Sakura were seen every now and then and for an odd reason, the flowers reminded her of her Lord's honey-comb flower print on his kimono. Periodically they passed villages and the smell of smoke and civilization stirred thoughts of food and society in Rin's mind.

Sesshomaru-sama, despite being with him for 4 years now, she never grew tired or bored of his demanding presence. He had these flowing locks of silver hair that floated past his back to his hakama. The hair miraculously never got tangled or messy to Rin's puzzlement. Many who had managed to walk past them alive gaped in awe, perhaps at the boa which hung on his right shoulder or the hilt of two swords which emitted a distinct level of youki, maybe even the strange facial markings and golden eyes which silently stared everything down, reading everyone's thoughts but never revealing anything. Whatever the case, Rin was always mesmerized with him, his behavior and stoic expressions were also intriguing. Somehow, she was not afraid of him like everyone else.

"Sesshomaru-sama?" she inquired, waiting for any sort of reply. Waiting was what Rin did best, waiting for Sesshomaru-sama. He paused in his quick stride and turned his head a fraction towards her direction. Despite its minute angle, Rin could still catch the golden orbs which never ceased to unnerve anyone, human or youkai staring back. Pulling a grin over her face, she happily responded

"May Rin go to the village for a while? I need food… Rin is hungry." Her stomach growled, as if on cue and she quickly glanced back at the toad-like youkai following clumsily behind pulling along the shape of a two-headed dragon. She did not want the toad youkai (Jaken-sama) to start nagging at her for stopping the group again. She patiently waited for a reply again.

She thought she saw Sesshomaru-sama cock his head downwards, yes! Food at last!

Rin bolted down the steep hill, enjoying the wind blowing against her face which radiated in youth and ignorance, yes, ignorance is bliss. She stopped for a while and peered back at her Lord, hoping that he was still watching her speed down the hill. Rin felt reassured when she saw yet again, the silvery hair that cascaded down his head to his hakama and the golden orbs which always mesmerized her. Rin swore anyone could get lost in the depths of his eyes. Ecstasy overcame her again, why she was so happy, Rin did not know but whatever it was, the knowledge that Sesshomaru-sama was always looking after her was a calming thought. She always was at awe with him for his strength and elegance; his queer facial markings also were an interesting aspect of the dai-youkai, he as a whole was a mesmerizing creature of beauty and menace. Rin shivered momentarily as she recounted the times when she had seen Sesshomaru-sama kill his victims mercilessly, never once staining his kimono. He could kill if he wanted to… yet, he had not harmed her. Rin continued running when she heard Jaken shouting in the distance.

The village was crowded, too crowded for Rin's liking. She was so used to being in the company of only two who usually kept silent that all the noise and bustle was giving her an unusual head ache. Rin was sick and tired of eating rabbits and mushrooms for the past few weeks, although she never complained to her Lord (and if she complained to Jaken, his nagging would start), she still had to eat something different once in a while.

Standing in the centre of the village, Rin took in all the sights and sounds of children playing and adults chatting. The smells were assaulting her form all directions, the sweet-scented sakura trees, the tantalizing vapors of food and the musty smell of perspiration. Her hair, raven black when in the shadows and slightly brown under intense sunlight wisped in the breeze as she ran her hand over her stomach. Hungry. I shouldn't take long… Sesshomaru-sama… and Jaken-sama would want me back soon; she mused looking at the sky. It was nearing the mid-afternoon and she hated traveling when the sun was at its highest. I am still hungry.

She did not need money; all she needed were her quick and nimble hands; fast reactions and a speedy get away. With this in mind, she the most crowded stall and the smell of Yakitori filled her nostrils, the smell looming before her and the steam wafting through the air and around the huge crowd surrounding the cart. Beckoning her to take it away. There was a large group of villagers clustering around that stall and it made Rin's task seem easier, the stall vendor would be too preoccupied with his customers that he wouldn't notice small hands creeping around the pots….

"WHACK", Rin flinched as the painful sting of a palm made its mark on her flesh. After years of following Sesshomaru-sama through the wilderness of Japan; encountering endless youkai of sorts, Rin had found it extremely helpful to remain silent if she was suddenly caught. She jerked back her arm through the crowd and found some other hand, one covered in a bandage tightly gripping it. The crowd was unbelievably huge that she could not find its owner. Immediately she panicked but was smart enough not to emit a whimper and attract more attention. Then, a head appeared from the entanglement and she pulled away desperately, still tightly holding the stick of Yakitori. She glanced at the face and frowned, it did not belong to the vendor, but that of a man whose face was half covered with a loose cloth except for his eyes and mouth. He smirked, yes! It was a smirk, and a snigger! Sesshomaru-sama did those all too often and she shrunk away from the arm desperately pulling as well as trying not to make a sound. Strangely, no one had noticed the affair. The face that the arm belonged to drawled

"You should be screaming right now, just like all the other thieves I catch. Why aren't you screaming? …Little one?" the voice sounded interrogative- no; it sounded cunning with an ulterior motive behind the supposed niceness as well as a tinge of deep curiosity. Rin pressed her lips determined to remain silent. The man released his death grip and Rin could feel the blood flowing back.

"Hmm, you are different; you know when to shut up. You don't scream…"

And the hand let go. Rin shuddered and scuttled backwards until she was further away from the man, wait, was he a man? Something was different about him… The clothed face watched her scurry away intensely, narrowed his eyebrows and appeared to be in deep thought… a smirk and a nod, and then it disappeared from the crowd.

Sesshomaru-sama's image entered her panicked mind and the image calmed her considerably. He will always be there for me, she considered and slowed into a brisk walk to savor her yakitori, immediately forgetting the incident between her and the foul creature that grabbed her hand to a point where she thought it would wither off.

"METSUBUSHI!" and a deafening roar ensued. A blinding light ripped its way into Rin's eyes and she was hurtled to the ground by an immense power. Momentarily fazed, Rin attempted to support herself and get up but her legs seemed to be held down by weights because she slammed back to the earth and her vision was blurred to an extent that even her hands were unrecognizable to her. The strong smell of sulphur filled the air and Rin felt helpless, weak, she felt like a real human as Sesshomaru-sama had said. Helpless mortals doomed to die. Rin sincerely felt like she was dying because a ripping sensation overcame her legs and her muscles twitched to an extent beyond pain. She thought she screamed and shrieked but her voice seemed imprisoned in her throat. She could not speak, could not even whimper as tears of inconceivable and unbearable pain created a torrent on her dirtied face.

Rin was still conscious when the same clothed face she had encountered earlier picked her up and brought her away from the wreckage of the village, from shallow waters of trouble, to a sea of unfathomable depths. "Sesshomaru….sama" Rin uttered and too weak and confounded to do anything else, she fell into a dreamless sleep.

Sesshomaru's POV

Rin has left for that human village we passed earlier for food. Useless humans who grow hungry each day; I cannot bear the stench of those foul creatures that live in congealed masses of slime and sweat, of which they call villages. From this distance of approximately 13 miles, I can still smell the odor of which they emit. To make things worse, the presence of this hamanasu are annoying me to no end. I cannot perceive why I think that they pester me so but I will refrain from trampling them only because it will make my presence known to other inferior youkai. Not that Jaken and Ah-Un have cautioned themselves onto not stepping on the flowers…. Rin does not trample on them but plucks them from their earthly home and presents the annoyances to me, expecting thanks… I do not even know why I allow her to pursue me.

I can bear the stench of the humans no longer. I will move towards the more peaceful presence of the forest and instruct Jaken to wait for her. The forest is only a few miles away; the human stench would be overcome by the mist of the woodland. Rin had better return by the time I have thought about matters pertaining to the western lands and why hamanasu bother me so. I detest, loathe and despise admitting this but the girl has softened me. Too much for my liking! Why do I keep her around? I shall sit in the calming presence of the trees to reflect on my cursed life with a more rational mind.

Sparks and showers of intense light… glittering, glowing…. She awoke.

Rin was confused. The only thoughts that lingered in her mind were a loud explosion, and the face of a man…

"Aah, the girl awakes." The abrupt sentence broke the harsh quietness of the remains of the village. There was a low murmur and Rin found that she was surrounded by a band of men, mostly tall men with broad shoulders. Black hakamas clung loosely to their hips and their presence unnerved Rin.

"That's quick… she got knocked out about ten minutes ago…" commented another voice. This voice sounded like the velvet rolling of thunder across a plain, thick and rich. Rin shuddered, Sesshomaru-sama…. Where is he? Why are you men surrounding me? Somehow, her questions could not leave her throat; she was too terrified to make a sound, stunned silence.

Suddenly, a strong and muscular arm, marked with scars from years of battle yanked her to a kneeling position and Rin whimpered. What a funny predicament… I've been through this before. Rin gave a bitter and sarcastic snort not because of the pain in which her skull was undergoing. Wait till Sesshomaru-sama hears about what you rogues have done to me. Rin felt strangely bold and reckless at such an inappropriate moment: must be because I'm about to die soon…

"Sesshomaru-samaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" she gave an impulsive and sudden ear-piercing shriek of her lord's name and the men flinched, some moved back hastily. She knew it would come, a firm and strong hand connected with her fragile cheek and a jagged slap-sound pierced through the silence. Rin did not even cry; she had felt it many times before; even though it had been five years ago.

"Unpleasant child, did we hear you mutter the name of the great western land ruler?" gave a voice filled with incredulousness and a howl of profanity-ridden banter roared around her. Rin had to cover her ears.

"The kid thought she'd scare us eh?" a brawly figure guffawed. His laugh sounded more like a hacking cough and a wheeze. The men shrieked yet again. "Foul drunken rogues"…. Rin scowled at them and spat.

The mirth was short-lived and the men stared at her with curiosity. Their expressions were suddenly unreadable; they reminded her of Sesshomaru-sama.

"Why you punk…I knew you were a typical foul-mouthed street urchin. Who are you to spit at is you-"

"-Enough Endan" the voice of thunder rolled in and cut the words from the man-who-wheezed-instead-of-laugh halfway. Endan backed off to where the rest of the curious band of men where and gave Rin a nasty grin.

"Girl…" The velvet voice continued and it soothed Rin despite her mind raging war against the calm in which the voice brought. Rin saw the aquamarine eyes… she froze; mesmerized by those eyes which had the same sparkling magnificence as the slit-pupils of Sesshomaru.

"…How have you come to possess such unshakable nerves? You do not cry when in pain nor do you spill out pleas. What are you to act so cool under this pressing situation?" he enquired. Rin felt the cool tip of the youkai's blade run lightly across her throat and she instinctively quivered, yet holding on to her hard and defiant expression. "Cool…?" she thought. She was anything but cool. However, Jaken-sama did comment on how she would suddenly look glassy whenever he nagged at her and how annoyed he was by that.

"It's almost like she's lived with some youkai or something… she has damn sharp reflexes I tell you. She nearly escaped my grip earlier on…. I wanted to crush her arm for the fun of it but I only caught her wrist!" came a familiar voice which was followed by a trail of snickers… Rin placed it; it belonged to the man who had "caught" her for stealing yakitori earlier. How much earlier? She did not know. The sky was filled with the swirling black and grey colour of smoke and there was an acrid scent in the air. Rin shifted her weight uneasily and the threatening blade moved along with her.

"You made us use Mitsubishi just for a GIRL!" one of them started in utter disbelief and a quick brawl erupted.

"-Silence!" and the thunder felt like lightning to Rin's ears. "She does have a high level of spiritual abilities for anyone… We could make her a kuro miko… ha-ha, yes! Anyway, she's seen too much and her potential is too good to be thrown away…" a voice, probably Endan's rang out.

"Hmm… you are true for once Endan…" and the youkai with the voice of thunder sighed.

"Yuragu… not another human…" came another voice form the group.

"NO!" Rin shrieked when she finally realised that she was about to be taken away. Possibly further then where Sesshomaru-sama would ever find her.

"NO! I want to be with Sesshomaru-samaaaa!" She yowled the band of men erupted into avid discussions still encircling her.

"Yes, my sweet girl with an impossible imagination. We'd take you with us. Be good to us and we won't harm you ok?" the cloaked man who had gotten Rin into this mess cooed. Rin struggled.

"WHAP-"more stars, colorful dots and the image of Sesshomaru-sama: Rin's mind was effectively black.

-Blackout-

**Sesshomaru's POV**

I arose from my deep thought when I caught the scent of wood burning. At first my mind tricked me into thinking that it was Jaken lighting a fire but I turned my eyes towards the distance where Rin's village visit had taken place and sighted black ash and smoke rise high into the heavens. I cursed under my breath and got up, thinking constructively. The fool, Jaken had better be looking for Rin as I strained my lax muscles into a swift bolt. With my superior youkai speed, I should get to the fire in less then a heartbeat. My instinct, urged me to run faster and faster and I pushed with all the strength my brawn could assemble. I pushed into the hot afternoon heat to arrive at the entrance- or what was left of an entrance to the village which was savagely wrecked by flames. I had caught the whiff of sulphur and other explosive powders…. Mitsubushi! My mind, as rare as never experienced a momentary halt and I could not bring myself to access the damage created. I was unsure of the cause but it was highly unlikely that anyone could have survived an attack with such a high powered weapon. Nevertheless, I stepped into the fires to look for Rin. Countless emotions surfaced and resurfaced but my years of training taught me to suppress them. Suppressing them is a sign of strength and I had the ultimate strength of control unlike pitiful humans with short lives…

The town had an acrid stench of fumes and detestable vapors. It was hard to admit that even as a superior inu-dai-youkai, this Sesshomaru was oppressed by the smells. My nose refused to work and I grew lightheaded. I swore to myself to sever Jaken's head with Tokijin, resurrect him with Tenseiga and mutilate him again and again until Rin-... Damn these useless emotions.

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tears my first published fan fic! Please please please please please review ok? I really need the useful feedback. I don't like flames so nono flames. Thanks! Hope you like!

Pheew, finally the end of chapter one. Ok. Review and tell me what you think ok? No chapter 2 unless there are reviews ok? Review Now! its just a click awaaaay!

Byeee!


	2. Who is this face?

Yo people! So sorry for the long wait. It's a valid reason! I had exams! Okok.

SO the next chapter is up!

Read it aaaand? Yes review!

Please review if you would like me to continue because I need the valuable advice both on storyline and grammar. Yup. I really really really value the advice. I would like to thanks everyone who commented on the previous chapter. I seriously need the feedback to improve my story. If I don't get enough reviews, I assume this storyline is not good and I would stop it all together. So please review! Come on! What's a nice review? Only a few words!

Enjoy

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Waking up….

The room was blurred and it had the faint smell of incense. Rin slowly sat up and rubbed her temples for the smell was nauseating. Massaging her raw and bruised back, Rin attempted to orientate herself to the room she was in. The attempt was futile. She found that she was resting on a wooden slacked floor. Instinctively, she knocked it. The sound was hollow, meaning that she was in an elevated room. The room was a squared shape and light filtered through a thin slat window. The shadows of leaves made their mark on the wooden flooring and Rin made the assumption that she was in a room in a forest. Everything seemed calm and for a moment Rin's mind told her that she was meant to be lying on that wooden floor; remaining there with a presence as subtle as the breeze which swayed the trees outside her cage.

Cage! She panicked. Where was she? Where is Sesshomaru-sama?

She crawled toward the sliding door as her legs were numb and aching. She felt trapped and a wee bit claustrophobic. She crawled and crawled, the path to the door seemed like miles away. Her vision was still blurred but she could more or less make out the shapes of her prison. By the time Rin was halfway there, a muscle in her leg twitched painfully and she toppled over, slamming her right shoulder onto the ground forcefully. Rin wailed in frustration and yanked her kimono forcefully, willing herself to crawl, lug and drag herself to the door. Anything! Alas, her young body could not muster the strength and she collapsed back to the ground. There was no use continuing her struggle to the door. She sniffed back a tear and racked her brain for a memory of how she had gotten herself into such a predicament.

Food…An explosion… A voice like thunder and slowly as she lay in the shadows, she managed to recollect her thoughts and she remembered. She had been knocked out, how long ago, she did not know but she had been unconscious, brought here by a band of brawly men.

"Sesshomaru-samaaaaaaaaaaaaa" she wailed. Unable to hold her cries of helplessness and worry. Her tears were rolling down her cheek in torrents. For half the afternoon, she lay there, sobbing; unable to figure out what to do.

**Later**

The sliding door emitted a low groan and its creaky rollers were rolled to one side.

"For my sanity, girl shut your mouth!" a loud shout filled Rin's ears and she cowered in fear. She peeped towards the entrance. Although the light was coming from behind the man, she could still make out his features. He had a well-built body and gave out a musty odor.

The brawly figure advanced towards her and she stifled a scream. The high pitched sound created a resonance in her throat. From her fear erupted a bold spurt of courage, just like how she always felt when she was cornered by a youkai and Sesshomaru-sama would save her. But- something told her that her lord was not coming today. He was not going to come in a long time. Her blind courage drove her thoughts into action. Rin wanted to escape so much that with her last ounce of strength; she made an irrational action of jumping up and tried to bulldoze the man out of the entrance and hopefully down a long flight of steps which lead to the entrance of her prison. At first she thought that she would fail because the man was obviously stronger than her. However, her sudden feat stunned her captor and both of them plummeted out of the room.

Rin expected them to land quickly on the ground but they were sailing through the air for a couple of metres. Arms flailing, the two of them plunged through space. Rin felt ecstasy instead of fear. She had developed a sadistic sense of humor while following Sesshomaru. She found it amusing to see gored and bloodied youkai and snickered at those who had the honor of Sesshomaru-sama taking their lives. When following him, she had been acquainted to death. Although Sesshomaru-sama rarely killed anything in front of her unless absolutely necessary, she had observed slaughter on her long journeys with the dai-youkai long enough understand the vicious and poignant beauty of the art of carnage.

Back to their situation, she felt no fear in falling although understanding the prospect of dying the moment her body made contact with the ground. Her frail ribcage would splinter and the bones would pierce her internal organs. Hemorrhaging would occur and she would die slowly. She only laughed; death did not seem fear-provoking. In fact, it would embrace her gently and quietly, like a mother would hold close a terrified child but with a sadistic twist. Anyway, she died before and it did not feel so bad…

Suddenly, a huge hand yanked the collar of her Kimono and she was hoisted out of the air (amazingly) and she landed in the arms of another stranger. Rin peered at his face and was addressed by the piercing gaze of aquamarine. There was a dull thump followed by a roar of jeers and cursing. The eyes studied her for a few more minutes and during that time; all which occupied Rin's mind were the eyes. He put her down moments later.

"I see you have met Endan…" he smiled grimly and Rin was soothed by his rolling voice yet again. The man (or youkai?) with aquamarine eyes had a similar characteristic to that of Sesshomaru-sama, she mused. Both of them had the ability to demand total attention and had an immense level of youki. Yes, youki, the man was a youkai. The youkai who was originally towering above her lowered himself to her level. Now chocolate and aquamarine locked and Rin felt the hair on her back stand.

"Little girl, I am Yuragu. You are safe in my village of assassins. We are curious about your nature and thus we will not kill you."

She found solace in his words and invisible embrace and she was brought back from her sadistic thoughts and back to the mind filled with thoughts more suited to an eleven year old.

The youkai Yuragu placed a hand on her thin shoulder and continued to stare into the depths of her eyes, further penetrating into the profound intensity of her mind. Rin was only thinking of how far he could read her and in her mind was the image of only his eyes. He jerked back, although it was a small movement, Rin knew that it had broken some unnamed connection. She thought she saw his brows furrow; was it sheer incredulity? He seemed startled at her intensity and maturity o he mind. She did not know because just like Sesshomaru, he abruptly sealed the gate to his mind through his eyes. What was left was the demanding presence of aquamarine.

He severed remaining connections by standing up. Once again towering over Rin. She could see that he was young (or perhaps young in Youkai age) with very sharp facial features. She could not observe for long because a meaty hand slapped her on the back and she whirled around. Once again fear engulfing her. She shuddered as the hand raised itself, as if preparing for a slap and she cowered anticipating the pain. The sharp sound of a slap came but she felt no pain. She looked up to see Yuragu receiving the meaty hand on the back, even his somewhat unshakable body structure swayed on the impact. Hollering- No was it laughter? Well, it was a weird sound of laughter erupted from the owner of the meaty hand.

"Yo- hohoho, Yuragu-!" it stuttered in between hiccups and trying to get Yuragu to understand what he was trying to say.

"That kid scared both you and me eh? Aah!" and another loud whoop.

Yuragu looked disturbed at the sudden friendly gesture and he gave a frown that looked familiar to Rin. It was a frown Sesshomaru gave whenever Jaken's blabbering pushed the boundaries or his sanity a little too far.

"Yes….Endan. How many times must I remind you not to slap me like that…?"

"Sesshomaru-samaaaaa"

"Endan, you blunt idiot, now she's crying as if the great western lord would come for her. She probably knows that all criminals like you are afraid of him! His name isn't well known to humans though. I wonder how she knows his name…"

"Ummm… Yuragu aren't you a criminal too?"

"Sesshomaru-samaaaaaaaaa!"

"Endan, you made her cry. Make her stop. My ears are ringing!"

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Focus on the target and you will hit it. Fingers that felt like silk traced a line on her arm and she gripped her Naginata tighter.

"Focus!" the voice of thunder rolled.

"WHACK!". The target swayed before making a resonating thud on the floor.

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**Four years later**

"Endan you fool!" Rin hollered and she got up and approached the

Figure which laughed as if he was coughing.

"What Rin? I did not know women like you play with combs!" Endan guffawed and threw his head back in a roll of hearty laughter. Rin scowled. Flash and her Naginata was out from its protective covering and pressed itself against the hollow of Endan's throat. She exerted a small pressure and she could feel his pulse through the hilt of her Naginata. Immediately Endan's chortles ceased and he stuttered.

"Easy now Rin… We both know how you can cut with that thing…I'm too young to die!" he whispered. One move and she could slit his throat.

"Hah!" Rin snorted and unexpectedly booted his belly backwards, yanking away her comb at the same time. She caught sight of his panicked expression and it was her turn to throw her head back in laughter. Endan did a miraculous attempt to cover up the expression and succeeded.

"Careful now, I could press harder if you ask me to…" Rin smirked and placed the comb in her satchel. Endan glared at her and reached into his pocket…

"WHACK!" and the flat part of her blade slapped Endan's wrist. Another snort erupted from the man.

"Don't even think of using your smoke screen on me you wretched swindler. You know how much I hate the smell… I could purify you-"

"-NO!" Endan burst and yanked his hand of his pocket, making a pretentious grin. Rin rolled her eyes and walked away. Endan always fell for that threat. Yes, although humans could not be purified, Endan had been around Youkai long enough to absorb some youki of his own. Years of sin and crime also made him a tainted soul. Rin could very well practice her skills and purify him, making him feel a stunning zap of electricity. Nah, she'd be wasting her energy.

Was she a miko? Well, Rin did not consider herself one. Yes, she had the ability to "purify" youkai; however, the youki that was purified would be absorbed into her Naginata, thus making it stronger. After years of training, Rin could make use of the thin balance between youkai and human, taping on youkai energy as well as wielding a Naginata. Yuragu had also trained her on Ninja-ken and Rin had perfected the art of disguise and fighting without weapons. She was often hired to carry out espionage on rich shoguns or daimyos. Her skill had in fact, exceeded every disciple in the village. She often pondered upon why a human could give out more energy as compared to a youkai. Perhaps it was her anger and resentment which she had the power to tap on to summon powerful attacks.

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Ok…. No cliff yet! Anyway. Don't forget to review.

So who is Yuragu, where is Sesshie! What happens? gaaaasps alright . You have to wait ad review. is the length ok? to short? too long?

Byee!


	3. Reminiscence of those years

Ok, so we start with Rin's really mature POV about how she was reborn…. Then wait

Is it all too messy? I'm sorry… because I was doing A LOT of deep thinking while writing this. I think it's a bit too perplex for my dear readers to understand. Is it? Oh and another thing, this chapter is particularly about Rin and Sesshie's thoughts about each other and opinions about stuffs (I'm not good at summaries so you have to read. XD)

Ohyah, this story has a gruesome and gory, very graphic part in the end, you can skip if you want.

enjoy

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Reminiscence of those years.

**Rin's P.O.V **

"Sesshomaru-sama…?" I always inquire starting with his royal name first and then I will wait for a hint of reply from my Lord. It has always been this little habit of mine to do so, ever since I began my life; pursuing him, my master. He resurrected me, pulled me back from the crooked-fingered Shimigani, or those wretched Pallbearers of Death who had come to take me. But- they were killed (ironic isn't it? death overcome by death) by him. Sesshomaru-sama is the ultimate. He is my owner and I am eternally indebted to him until the Shimigani return for the last time to claim my soul to the depths of Meidou. The lowest of the lowest levels in Meidou will I reside, for I defied death once by Sesshomaru-sama's hands. I was pulled back from my fate and given a second chance; I followed a dai-youkai who slaughtered humans with a cold face; I was cursed ever since his tenseiga blade met the throats of the Shimigani. I assume he understood what he would be doing by bringing my soul back. Jaken-sama often complains to me about my disgusting existence and how he swore that he saw Sesshomaru-sama hesitate the moment he wanted to resurrect me. Jaken-sama claims that Sesshomaru-sama was contemplating the idea of resurrecting a human and how it would affect his moral and social status. However, I know Sesshomaru-sama is not a youkai of looks and social status, I know that he had been thinking of what both our fates would be should he resurrect me. And he did.

Often on our journeys, I had thought of why Jaken-sama laments my rebirth and never ceases to nag at me. I also think of why Sesshomaru-sama gave me life again. The second question of which I will never understand. Sometimes, I feel that I drag Sesshomaru-Sama and Jaken-Sama in their journeys and I have often thought of running away to do them a favor. However, the cold, golden, piercing orbs of gold lock me in my actions. They make me stop all thoughts of running away from him. I make it sound as if he has placed some invisible shackles on my hands and legs, preventing me from running. I do not doubt that he has done that. Although we have come to a common understanding that he does not want me to flee, although sometimes he says I am free to go when I please: He has chained me to him, however, the keys to my chains are with me; I am bound but I may be free.

I know that my thoughts for an eleven year old a far too deep and intense, I have cultivated this art of deep thinking after following and observing my master… Journeying in silence gives one the "peace" to understand the ways of life better. Alas, I have no idea how to eliminate my innocent and naïve appearance. I know that I can understand and reflect matters to a high extent. But! - But, I lack the skills to put it into words (probably because of my lack of education). If I had known how to write, I probably would have written and wasted scripts of paper as long and vast as Sesshomaru-sama's lands.

He gave me back my life which chains me to him and I may run away based on my free will and the grudging permission of his to let me go which is my key. All this is perplexing, even to me, the creator of this myriad. Sometimes when I am half awake, I observe my master, who always surveys the night sky as if searching for some answer. His brows would furrow and he would appear in deep thought. I think he is thinking about why he resurrected me.

I am unafraid of death or Meidou. This is because…. I don't know.

* * *

You let me go? How can it be? You have always come for me! Ever since Naraku kidnapped me you would always retrieve me! Why is now different?! I don't want to be alone again! Sesshomaru-sama! I don't want to be with these rogues. Sesshomaru-sama! I know you will come for me!

* * *

**Sesshomaru's P.O.V**

The girl intrigued me. This is probably the most valid and comprehendible reason for me to resurrect her and allow her to follow me. I was curious as to how she would grow up. She possessed this capacity to understand matters far beyond her years. I had known, of course, that if I resurrected this human, there would be a high chance of her being cursed to the lowest levels of the Meidou for being brought back from her fate. I also knew that I would be giving myself a heavy burden which would be unnecessary. By resurrecting her, I would be given the position of her lord and re-creator. I would be responsible for her, as much as I hated to admit it. I am responsible for no one. I protect no one and I care for nothing. I am the inu-dai-youkai Sesshomaru. What am I to bind myself to such a burden?

I was intrigued the moment I saw the girl. She possessed this unnatural depth of understanding and it was annoying to allow such a depth of mind to go unnoticed…- No, un-studied. I enjoy assessing and observing people's minds and personalities. This girl would be my entertainment for the while until I grow bored of her. I have already finished assessing Jaken. I knew that such a shallow character as he would not allow my curiosity to last. The human should provide me with amusement for about eighty-years. Disgusting short lived creatures, this girl does not reek as bad as her male species although she does emit a smell, it is bearable. Once I have finished assessing her or she proves to be more of a burden then I had perceived, I would just kill her.

I did not contemplate not resurrecting her for too long because what do I care for humans? She would just be a possession to me. Like a comb, once it has broken teeth, you throw it away with no feelings. The human would be no different. Would I care if I would have cursed her to the lowest of the low levels of Meidou? My father had not cursed that wretched Izayoi only because he resurrected her out of love. Love is an alien emotion to me. I also do not wish to familiarize myself with it. This Sesshomaru has no dealings with such a weakness.

I clearly remember the first few weeks in which the girl pursued me. I grudgingly say that the girl's appearance had caused me to underestimate her (although I rarely think wrongly about anyone). Despite her bony body frame as well as a tattered Yukata, the girl managed to follow me through the wilderness. I refused to protect her the first three days because I wanted to see how dependant she would be on me. The wretch was in luck because I sensed no youkai on those three days. She was lucky….

The next month, I had observed closely; scanning her every move over and over again. The only thing that disturbed me (as much as I hate to admit) was that she could remain silent. Stark silence. She had not uttered a word ever since her rebirth. Yet, when I question or command her, I catch this deep stir within the fathoms of her eyes. As if she was weighing, inferring, concluding and comprehending whatever I tell her. She indeed possessed the rare capability to comprehend matters far beyond her years.

I have the tendency to intimidate someone by making my presence and purpose clear to them. I even increase the respect they hold for me by utilizing the presence of "personal space". I step close to them and stare into the vacuum of knowledge in which their eyes hide and make them feel as if I am reading them like a book. Fools- No, the smart ones believe that I am actually doing so and submit to my will and do anything they can to please me. Only the reckless or crazed dare stare back and attempt to assess my own eyes. Most of those who dare return the challenge break down once I increase the intensity and my gaze proceeds to pierce through them. In the end, I am only a powerful dai-youkai, not a mind-reader and after my centuries of perfecting this talent of mine, I have successfully enabled myself to perfect my face and build a fortress around the same organ I use to assess others which can also reveal myself to them if they try hard . The girl surprised me when I attempted to challenge her. As impractical as it is to challenge a child, I was curious as to how she would respond to my "threat". Would she cower in fear or would she boldly, but foolishly return the gaze? I half expected her to do the first option. Yes, and according to cliché, at first, the girl shrunk back when I started the challenge. Then, once again, I caught the faint and distant stirring within her human eyeball. From becoming distant and glassy, her gawk focused and sharpened. The girl had the cheek to sharpen her own gaze and return my stare, but with double the power and intensity. This was unexpected and as much as I hate to admit it, I recoiled in astonishment and- I have forgotten the rest of the details so I won't bother recalling such an insignificant event.

* * *

Where is Rin?! I scoured the charred remains of the pathetic village to find my possession. Whatever made me believe she was alive amidst the rubble? A mortal human girl against a blazing fire probably caused by one of those pathetic Metsubushi bombs built by rogues? WHERE is she?! I had instructed Jaken to wait for her around the outskirts of the village after punishing him with the flat side of my Tokijin. I couldn't be bothered to use my Tenseiga to resurrect and curse him. I do not feel like returning to him. The loss of a possession irks me more then anything. Something tells me that the girl would not be killed so fast… I know that she is still alive…-I will not stop looking for her!

"Enough! I won't wallow in self-pity"

* * *

**Rin's POV**

3 Years after her capture

Mornings… How she hated them. They reminded her of how things always were a circle; a continuation of the past and the repeat of incidences. Rolling to the left of her Futon, Rin wiped the droplets of perspiration off her back and kneaded her arm. She winced as her index finger rubbed a particularly sore portion of muscle and scowled. Wiping the remaining beads of sweat of her forehead, she sat up and was embraced by the warm feel of sunlight on her skin, filtering through the wooden slats oh her hut. She always asked herself what she was doing alive in the mornings. Who was she? Rin .What was she? An assassin. Why was she there? She owned that small hut in the village of assassins. She was brought here four years ago after she was aban- No. She refused to answer the last question. Just like the previous mornings.

Sometimes she wondered why she woke up alive, not dead. She was better off dead. Death seemed like a peaceful prospect. She liked the appealing idea of sleeping for an eternity. Anyway, the training given by him was so hectic that anyone would wish for a lifetime of peace living in a monastery. Wait, she was an assassin, how degrading it would be to retire in a monastery. She spat onto the ground floor just to emphasize the disgust of the last thought.

Rin sat up and massaged her scalp. Her hair had grown considerably longer although she refused to tie it up. Its raven-blackness was still apparent and never ceased to appeal to other villagers. Sitting up, she stifled a yawn; appreciating the "eye spots" it gave from depriving her head of enough air. Rin snickered; she was as sadistic as ever.

She looked at the silver threads which made prints on the thin sheet which covered the futon and cursed; immediately standing up as if disgusted. The thin threads of silver reminded her of what she had fought so hard to forget, a dark memory of her life before the assassins…. Rin ground her teeth together and let out a squeal of detest. She laughed at her own foolishness, which person alive would be so dumb as to continuously sleep on the same sheets every night and yet detest its sight for it brought back memories both tender and loathed? The answer was there, Rin. She mentally chided herself. For some reason, as much as she hated to admit, as disgusting and hateful the memory of her Lord- Stop!

"HE I'SNT MY LORD!" she cried in frustration. –She couldn't forget him… As angry as she was towards him… she simply could not erase him. Rin sighed and forced the issue back into the darkest realms of her mind just as she always did the previous months. She was sick and tired or thinking of him returning constantly- STOP! She commanded herself. She slinked groggily to the entrance and into the full morning sunshine.

"Enough! I won't wallow in self-pity"

-

The village in which Rin and her fellow assassins resided in consisted of mainly youkai and only five humans, including her. No hanyous. Although the humans and dai-youkai had a somewhat grudging respect towards each other, none of the deadly inhabitants could tolerate hanyou. To both humans and dai-youkai, hanyou were despicable creatures of filthy and impure blood. Creatures that did not deserve to exist. Humans feared the hanyou's higher and deadlier abilities while Youkai despised the hanyou's lowly or weak powers. Hanyous were the in-betweens' bread by parents of immature actions. Before her years in the rural community, Rin had no definite opinion of hanyous. However, it was only recently that she had developed a judgment towards hanyous. Anyway, she had always lived amongst people who held grudges against half-breeds… Not to mention Sesshomaru—Rin paused at the last thought, shook her head and proceeded to the courtyard in the centre of the settlement to receive her daily commands from the head of her team.

The assassins existed in divisions which were given to them the moment they had an existence in the village. The divisions were based on an individual's weapon of choice and Rin, who had been given the Naginata (the halberd), was placed in team Kougeki which specialized in making direct attacks to enemies or targets given by clients who preferred a fast death to their victims as compared to other teams which specialized in espionage or the Shuriken who could keep a victim in his pain for weeks before he died. However, Rin, being only fourteen was not allowed to follow Yuragu and his team Kousu on raids. Also, her victims were lesser-youkai horded by another team which was responsible for training rookies or new assassins.

Hierarchy in the village was a complicated factor which Rin, as much as she tried could not decipher. However, it was essentially such that there was no headman in the village. There was only this pair of chosen mates who had to be youkai. They were in charge of business dealings with foreigners. They were in charge of bringing in the dirt or jobs as well as organizing raids. The rest of the positions of honor followed the ancient times where the youkai were the more superior compared to humans. Mammal Youkai were more worthy of respect as compared to reptile or bird Youkai. Inu Youkai and wolf Youkai also had the tendency to inhabit the higher ranks of the village. They received the harder, dirtier jobs and received the greatest pay.

Rin had never ventured past the thick and lush forest which surrounded her village. The forest which created a natural barrier also made the village virtually unknown to the locals living on the other end. The assassin's village was only whispered behind the closed doors of the rooms of rich Shoguns and Daimyos, both youkai and human. The assassins were an invisible force to be reckoned with. Of course, the centuries of enhanced studies and mere experience made their villagers highly advanced and their weapons effectively deadly. In fact, the latest weapon was the poison Metsubushi which released shrapnel and poisonous vapors on the moment of activation. Yuragu had said that Rin would only be allowed to leave the village after her fifth year. In fact, all assassins were only allowed to officially lay eyes on a target after the fifth year of their stay. On the day in which they were allowed to leave, they would celebrate it by slaughtering a dai-youkai. After a gruesome and gory occult ritual, his or her weapon would be dipped in the blood of their first kill. The blood would be allowed to drip onto a thick strip of white linen which was tied tightly onto the new assassin's arm. The bandage of linen represented the assassin's soul and the dripping of blood signified that the assassin would live for killing only. After the ceremony, the assassin would be a changed person, both mentally and spiritually. Yuragu had told her that once an assassin had gone through the ceremony, nicknamed The Ordeal, he would have to live for the kill. He lived to see his victim die. He would celebrate death and mourn life. He would be one with his weapon. As quoted directly from the words inscribed in the sacred mantras found in the village's temple.

(Beginning of Gore)

Rin had watched the ordeal three times. She had seen the new assassin slowly slit the head of its victim which was strapped to a wooden alter. The victim would squirm under the hurt and would start to scream. Rin enjoyed their screams for mercy and loved to observe the stoic and detached face of the candidate. Once the sacrificial blade reached the center of the victim's neck, the youkai would have already ceased to scream anyway. Rin vividly remembered the gore of blood and brain spray the chipped surface of the wooden block and remembered the mutilated face of every sacrifice. Each of the victims had been large dai-youkais.

Beautiful creatures of strength and power- Power taken away by his executioner and absorbed into his blade. Rin remembered one of the victims of The Ordeal. He was a beautifully majestic dai-youkai with Bird origins. He had taken his human form and was tightly restricted to the table. She had passed him before his sacrifice and there was barely a crowd forming. She remembered when he turned his head in her direction and she dared peer into his deep crimson eyes. Rin dared to survey his soul and from it, she recoiled in horror, grief and wretchedness. That had been the first time she encountered such fear and dread faced by a particular person. His eyes begged her to release him from his fate and if she could recall correctly, a single tear fell gracefully from the corner of his eyes, marring the perfection of his face.

The face which made his existence paradox. It appeared so peaceful and untouched, yet, Rin could sense the pain and fear in which his eyes had been howling, shrieking, crying and beseeching her to help. From under his head lay a crushed wing which had been twisted from his shoulder blades and under his body. The feathers were blood stained and the dai-youkai's long black hair made an unnatural flow around his head. It was a still picture of gothic beauty. Rin was mesmerized by the exquisiteness which the scene radiated.

Being deeply mesmerized by the poignancy of the situation, Rin did not sense Yuragu. He had placed a hand on her shoulder and told her with a sudden seriousness that she must never ever connect with a victim no matter how much it beseeched to her or appealed to her. He reminded her that life was as short as it was disposable. Fate was the same for everyone and it was fixed. She had immediately wanted to tell Yuragu with the faintest hope that fate could be changed but she shut herself up when the pitiful creature on the sacrificial alter emitted a high pitched shriek. Rin turned around to see him entangled in a particularly thick bundle of rope. She wanted to help, naturally, she NEEDED to help! But the creature, further twisted his body with entwinement of rope, blood, hair and wings. In a while, the twisting stopped and the atmosphere gave a sudden chill. All the while Yuragu had restrained her with a firm palm. He lowered himself close to Rin's shaking shoulder (she had obviously understood what was happening) and whispered words she no longer remembered. He then walked off to instruct someone to throw the corpse off a nearby cliff. Everyone thought the sacrifice had been wasted. However, there had been a young and no longer innocent soul that night which had matured and went through its own augmentation.

She had no idea why she enjoyed such explicit gore.

(End of Gore)

Rin understood the simplicity of life. Many people proclaim that life is complicated and difficult. Rin gave a loud snort of disapproval which startled a youkai walking past her into starring. Rin ignored it.

Life is as simple as you make it out to be.

End of story-

Okays people, this is the end of story three. Please please please review! I couldn't beg for it more because I would take up the whole page… Come on… it's like there were 300++ hits and only 13 reviews. Whatever happened to the other 300++ readers??? Huh?? What happened to them? I'm trying to figure out. Will somebody answer this deep question of WHAT happened to the other people who stumbled onto this humble web page? Come on. I appreciate the reviews. It's only a short paragraph of what you think about the story and it does not even consume much chemical energy… come on. You know you can do it! The button is only there Points to review button in bottom left-hand-corner and waves hand about its just a wee button! You can do it!

I would really like to thank EVERYONE who reviewed. Thanks so much for the support! I appreciate the effort!

XDD Ga matte ne!


	4. So real, you can touch it

Hiya! Yipeee, another chapter is up and I hope you guys like it.

Ok, and can you guys tell me what you want to know more of when Rin is living in the village? Cause I am always talking about what she thinks and how she is feeling but never about stuff like her village and the people there. Basically tell me if you want more action and stuff. Send in suggestions ok?

A note on why Sess thought 4 years wasn't long. Cause dai-youkais live for thousands of years, to him, 4 years is like 4 days.

MANY MANY MANY thanks to (in no order):

Ashley, for the great reviews

Darth Squishy for the funny comments

MyDearSesshy for the new ideas

DCoD for the feedback

Yun Miyo Yuku for the positive advice

Lisa for the support

DRD for the "future prediction" hmmms. Oh, and to comment on your review: Perhaps... haha, but I wont make the sacrifice Sesshie cause the story would be too cliche. I've though of another way for them to meet. Your guess was close htough ;).

Thanks ALOT guys!

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* * *

Glint 

The moment her victim's back caught the light of the moon, Rin's sensitive and keen eyes caught the long strands of beautiful silver hair in her memory. The fur which covered the back of the Inu-Youkai glistened under the rays which the moon reflected. The shadows from the thick undergrowth also caused an illusion that the length of the tail of Rin's victim was exaggerated. Rin stopped for a moment to admire the beauty of the Inu-Youkai. Although it was a few meters away, Rin could see that its size was incomparable to hers. The Youkai basked under the delicate rays of the moon and stretched its long and muscular limbs which were covered in a thick layer of ghostly white hair. The nature of the Youkai was so majestic and captivating that for a moment, Rin thought that it was a lost phantom roaming under the vast night sky. The beauty of the creature- its hair… It reminded her so much of-

"Do not attach yourself to your victim"

Rin's muscles tensed and her grip on her Naginata tightened. All of a sudden she felt this deep clenching feeling within the depths of her body and her heart felt as if it was being clamped by a great iron fist. Rin struggled to stifle a cough. This feeling had not come to her in a long time. Although it was an unusual visitor, the emotion was nevertheless familiar and struck a deep and longing memory within Rin's mind. She struggled and struggled to forgot her emotions and focus on her victim which she had spent so much of her time for to track down. She struggled…

---

Rin awoke with a sudden jolt which earned her a hard and cruel twist of a neck muscle. She yelped and kneaded the stinging spot on her nape. She found that her palms were wet with perspiration and her futon was drenched with the smell of perspiration and her monthly blood. Rin scowled and shook her head, an annoyed expression took hold of her face.

"The dream has come back to haunt me!" She cried exasperated. Rin shuddered and the hairs on her arm and back rose; giving her an unnatural feeling of warmth. She hugged herself. It was the third time that month where she dreamt of her victim for The Ordeal. Her turn to become a real assassin was only in autumn and it was nearing mid-summer. Rin had always desired to sacrifice a bird Youkai. They were renowned for being the hardest to capture and the most emotionally burdening to sacrifice. Bird Youkai were known for their great and magnificent beauty. Thus, it was typical for a foolish would-be assassin to choose a bird Youkai to sacrifice because a time, the bird Youkai "connected" with its murderer and the would-be assassin would break down and refuse to kill it. Rin saw it happen very often. So far, only one assassin had succeeded in sacrificing a bird Youkai and the assassin's future was sealed as the highest in social ranks amongst all assassins. However, it was a he who had sacrificed a male bird Youkai, he was also known for being very diplomatic and emotionally-detached; he was also a Youkai. Humans unlike Youkai were proven to have a greater ability to feel for their victims. Thus, human assassins were generally weaker then others. The assassin who had managed to sacrifice the bird Youkai was Yuragu.

Rin had openly declared that she was a feminist. Female assassins her age were flamboyant and wild. They were continuously in the company of males either assassins or outsiders as Rin had observed. She especially enjoyed observing their behavior around Yuragu and Endan. Other female assassins who were fifteen wore highly revealing clothes claiming that it helped to give them more flexibility and comfort during raids. Rin scowled at their lame excuse. It really was a stupid excuse to be covering one's body to the bare minimum. Rin never failed to pity or feel embarrassed for another assassin who was acting flirtatious and coy around Yuragu. Firstly, Yuragu would ignore their efforts and even roughly shove them aside if they became too touchy and secondly, they were a disgustingly and disturbingly identical mimic to the stray dogs which she used to observe when she was young. A group of scrawny and rabies-stricken bitches with tails wagging trailing a pitiful male dog with the faint hope of bearing his young: It was disgusting because none of them seemed fit enough for the job.

Rin shuddered yet again when she remembered another incident…

Cool water. I love water especially when it runs against my feet. The feeling is so unexplainable and the rationale for dipping my grimy feet into the stream is simple. My Naginata provides me with fitting company whenever I allow myself simple indulgences of time and a stream. My training is so goddamned hectic that I never get to rest by the side of the road and observe the rat race in which many of us pathetically call life. I love to ponder out loud when I am alone, it is easier to clear my thoughts. Recently, many of the male Youkai had been giving me this odd, unnatural, abnormal, unnerving, unsettling, intimidating and perverted look and I am desperate to know why. I had consulted Yuragu, one of the only demons in this warped village who I can faithfully rely on to give me trustworthy advice. Everyone else takes me for a joke because even at my age of fifteen (I turned 15 last spring), I appear naïve and decent. I am NOT naïve! I cry out loud to Yuragu all the time. He merely replies with a faint nod and "I know".

Anyway, Yuragu says that it comes from the complicated fact that I am fifteen which is the age where normal woman get married. It took me a mere minute or so to grasp what he was trying to tell me and the idea disgusted me. It really did! Once I unearthed the detestable justification of the male youkai's filthy and nauseating habits, I felt sick to the stomach. In fact, I was so disgusted so much so that I avoided all the males in the village for a week or two. I would never sell my body to another male, Youkai or human. NEVER! I will NEVER belong to another person. I had been a possession to a dai-youkai before… his name, I refuse to remember. I felt chained to him. I will NEVER be chained to anybody. I belong to nobody but Meidou.

It was coincidental that I was pondering on this issue because at that moment, a rowdy team of five youkais, rookie assassins, appearing two years my senior approached me in my deep thoughts. I gave them my deepest and most sincere scowl because I had made it clear to my fellow assassins that I hated people to approach me whenever I was in thinking. All of a sudden, the calm a stillness which the stream radiated turned into a sickening barrage of shouts and joking. I felt nauseated in their presence. The team that approached me was from this small team of youkais skilled in espionage. No wonder I did not sense the fools…Anyway, they were a bunch of rogues renowned for their bawdy and rowdy behavior. I knew that long ago and they were a group I paid extra attention to avoiding. Of course, the training in the village of assassins is superb… what was I thinking; of course they would find me.

I get up to leave…

"Rin-Chan- No, Rin-sama (whoops and laughter), we had the privilege to be assigned to this raid where we had to inspect a rich shoguns house…" one of the fools started.

I paid no attention and silently prayed to kami to smite them on the spot, if not, I would carry out his deadly will upon this offensive assembly of trouble-makers.

"—and", one of them bravely continued. I swore silently for allowing myself to undergo persecution.

Luckily for them, I continue to ignore their pathetic attempts until-

"-We saw that your Gi and Yukata are old and tattered so um… we stole some for you…" one of them managed to stutter.

I sensed something was amidst.

Before I could reply, they hurtled a paper package at me.

I picked it up.

It seemed innocent enough because it was merely brown paper wrapped by a string.

"Go on… Open it!" One dared to prod at me. I sensed a hint of amusement and I felt like defying his concealed-command. However, my morbid curiosity took hold of me and I opened the package, haltingly; unwittingly putting making myself the center of a bawdy joke.

I half expected a snake to uncurl from the darkness within the package…

The tightly wrapped crumpled paper wrapping gave way when I grew impatient and used my Naginata to hack it apart. I did not care for what was within the package as I had half the mind to throw its contents back at them. I was in for a shock.

After shaking the package hard enough, I found that there was nothing within it. Their crude and earthy joke had clearly stumped me for a while. I stared at packaging which was supposed to contain a Gi and Yukata stolen for me for approximately a minute and unable to register the horror and meaning of the not-so-practical prank they were playing on me.

The IMBECILES! My cheeks flamed to an unhealthy red color and I remember the heat of their stares piercing into my back. They hooted in laughter and swore crudely. Since I was unused to being fooled, I thus was unable to react properly. As unusual, I stood there shell-shocked and unable to repel the joke like the other female assassins would do. I even admit that I lacked social skills: Thus, I did what I swore I would never do after my thirteenth birthday. I dropped my Naginata and crumpled over. I cried.

**Sesshomaru's POV**

The forests, for once in my life seem to last forever. I pad restlessly through the deciduous floor and leave no imprint on the ground. Damn that Jaken. He has slowed me down for 4 years! He is a feeble Youkai! I think of him to be even more disgraceful compared to the lesser-Youkai. He claims to be a dai-youkai but he can barely travel at speeds equivalent to one! No- even Rin runs faster than him! She even knows when to offer her opinion and when to remain silent. Why did I not just kill Jaken and resurrect Rin only? I am nearing the frayed edges of my wits with this dreaded toad-Youkai and I am tempted to kill him. I swear, my ego has taken a pathetic drop since the century where I had slaughtered the Bake Mono that was seizing Jaken's empire. Alas I cannot murder him for my current situation does not allow me to fulfill such a rewarding act. Jaken holds the staff of humans and after I find Rin, Jaken will look after her if I decide to seek solace alone for a few days and leave them alone. I am willing to keep Rin as a travel companion- No, as a possession. However, Jaken is a different case. I force Jaken's pitifully green and ugly image out of my head.

Now, I must focus my attentions to searching for my fragile possession who I had "misplaced" in a village four damned years ago. I mentally berate myself for not demanding that Jaken had to follow her.

"Why on this damned earth am I persisting in searching for my long lost possession?"

Damn. My damned conscience is telling me to give up my search on her,

Again.

Why? My mind continued to prod; do you insist that I give up on her? Why? Sesshomaru do you persist in searching for something that is already lost? Something that you are unsure is alive or not? Are you not supposed to conquer new land for your empire?

I paused at the last thought. It was a new thought. My sudden halt and the silence that followed were rudely disrupted when Jaken crashed through the underbrush yelling my name in broken syllables. My ears were greatly pained and I was forced to utter his name to make him cease his continuous assault on them.

"Hai! Sesshomaru-sama!"

I did not reply to him. Instead, I stood for the longest time to consider the newest reason from my mind to stop my long and desperate search for her. I looked at the darkening sky and admired the long streaks of wispy clouds. They reminded me of the long silver hairs that covered my mane when I was in True Form. My mane… it was a long time since I had last transformed. I desired to change. Heck, if I was a damned three-legged dog-Youkai. I was still powerful and potent in that form and I was still capable of instilling fear within the hearts of even the largest Youkai. Changing made me relax and appreciate myself more; probably because it stirs a certain sleeping beast within my soul that takes control of me when I am in that form. The beast makes all irrational actions rational and it makes all sin sound just. It is the feral side of me that is suppressed when I am in this form. The metamorphosis always brought me an unnamed pleasure and I hated to hide my true form again. Why was this Sesshomaru forced to hide himself?

Hide himself in the form alike to that of a human.

A deep, yet impractical yearning to change stirred from within. It had pushed me hard enough to force me to emit the rare, random sigh- or wheeze. I was bored and flicked my hair. I was bored of looking for Rin with no results. There was talk of young girls named Rin who were found. However, not one of them was credible.

Why should I hide? My mind inquires, why am I hiding myself from the reality?

What I am doing now? Existing in this fake form.

The reality: I am an Inu-Youkai.

The reason: I can wield a sword and I have my abilities which exceed the power of that when I have transformed.

What will I do now? I will transform to answer the calling rising deep from within my loins which begs me to morph. It begs me to be real again. I usually am not that generous… But I have yearned for this moment.

What am I doing now? Searching for Rin?

The reality: I am forced to admit, I don't know.

Why are you continuing? This time, for the first time in centuries, I felt hopeless again. This was something even I, Sesshomaru could not answer.

What will I do now? I will morph into my real form. I do not wish to think of an answer for once.

There was a sudden urgency in the wind and the trees. Everything seemed restless. How fitting, I thought. Now my surroundings are urging me to transform.

All right, I shall give them the fortune of witnessing this beautifully majestic phenomenon.

I thrust my memories and burdens over my shoulder and willed my body to change. Heck, in the middle of the forest, no one would bother about a rampaging Inu-Youkai. I snigger sardonically. I was literally exuding copious amounts of Youki and the grass which my feet were upon shriveled, Apparently Jaken sensed the tremendous increase of Youki rising and shuddered. The coward, he has seen me change before.

I know that I have grown considerably stronger since I had last foolishly changed and had my left arm hacked of by a pathetic hanyou… My Youki had thus grown immensely stronger through the years. After defeating the pathetic Naraku who depended on the Shikon No Tama for power, Tokijin had absorbed a fraction of Naraku's Youki. I was therefore unsurprised when I felt slightly overwhelmed with the sudden outburst and increase of Youki. It felt good, it felt intoxicating; it felt Wild. My backbone extended; stretched and the sensation was pure ecstasy as I could feel every vertebrae expand and grow larger. I buckled forward as my back formed a faultless curvature which accented the strong Youkai-muscles in my back. I had to stretch my back and feel the tension in the muscles, the muscles which rippled under my skin from the strain of changing. I felt fur sprouting from my skin which gave a prickling and itchy sensation. I refused to scratch myself like a common dog. I bare a smile with my elongated fangs and catch sight of my extending muzzle. The velvet and coarse hairs which lined my nose and snout had a shiny luster under the pale light of this night's moon. My wild and feral fangs! I ran my tongue over the sharp tips and a low and deep hum resounded from deep within my throat signaling my pleasure and excitement. My arm and legs elongated. Muscles I had long forgotten started developing in the calves. I flexed the assets and admired them with pride under the light of the moon. My hands and feet further grew into large an appendage with deadly claws. I am capable of ripping a forest to shreds with them. I could if I want to, rip humans and other insignificant Youkai…

This Sesshomaru would allow himself to be reckless for once; for once only before I retire to conquering new lands.

I would allow myself the luxury of behaving like a wild animal for once. For once I will allow myself to satisfy the inner beast which I had suppressed all the time when Rin was around. Rin- the name had suddenly halted my change. The change brought on a sudden pain as the developing bones came to a crunching halt. I scowl in detest at the stop. I could feel the mutated bones grinding and churning into each other; screaming and beseeching me to continue their growth. Why would her name halt me? Was it because I had never once showed her my true form? I scowl. Why would I care if I frighten the girl?

Once again I will the change and this time I take on my full form. I sense Jaken slumped against a tree and laugh inwardly. Does he dare insult me? I am capable of devouring him in this form and he dares close an eye to my majestic appearance. I contemplate eating him but was repelled when my heightened sense of smell picked up Jaken's sour stench from my distance above the ground. My eyes are glowing a crimson red and the dai-youkai blood coursing through my veins sung in all its glory. I felt alive and real again and the newer and higher level of Youki I had suppressed earlier was intoxicating. I was easily towering over most of the trees. I stretched my three limbs and I had to admit that with three legs, it was challenging to remain in balance. Heck, I would grasp it soon. A last whiff of Jaken drove me to glide away and appreciate the feeling of the moon's rays gracing my back in a clearing which could accommodate my superior size. I was reluctant to think of stately matters as well as Rin- Rin! I'm wasting time…

Damn my double conscience. Why am I encouraging a double personality…?

One should restring his bows or snap. I am re-stringing my bows today. I think I will hunt cattle. I desire the taste of blood and entrails once again. I refused to mar my outwardly appearance in my other form. In this form, I was free.

I arch my back and howl to the moon with a feeling of adrenaline rushing through my entire being. It felt good. It felt very good.

**Rin's POV**

I think existing in this village is the most tiresome and arduous task. All that fills the hours of a rookie assassin is training and tutorials about physical geography, keeping away unwanted attention and struggling to maintain an acceptable social status in the village. Right now, I am appreciating the quiet and peace which the night brings before my team leader Musashi calls us in to retire for the day. I always feel calm and at ease under the night sky for some odd reason. Under the night, I feel that I can be… I'm lost as for what to say I can be under the night sky. Innocent? I am confused as to what I am trying to be in this village. In front of other assassins who are supposed to be fellow friends, I put up a brave and detached front. I have no idea why I do this. I know, I am meant to be something else. Perhaps a free spirit meant to soar through the night sky on the back of a majestic Youkai? I allowed myself to act prissy and meek for once when I am alone and emitted a string of childish giggles. I amaze myself sometimes. I think I should be called "Rin-of-a-thousand-faces". I giggle yet again. I feel happy to be under the great and majestic sky which everyone on this earth is under, great Youkai or weak human. We all share the same sky, just as how we all share the same fate of embracing death in the end.

It is on nights like these when my anger and grudge against…

"Sesshomaru-sama", I whisper and hug myself. At first I was stunned at the reaction which made me look as if I needed a companion and I mentally berated myself for acting pitiful. Alas, the night sky humbled my ego and I once again allowed myself to think of my master. I wonder what he would be doing at this present moment. I admit that I am a strange person with mixed feelings towards my old master. Sometimes in the midst of training, I picture his stoic expression and merciless culling and I boil in fury. Yet, sometimes when I am alone and thinking of him, I picture the same stoic expression and merciless killing and, appreciate its beauty. I see the beauty which lies in his stoic expression within the symbols which mark his face and the intensity and fury which his golden eyes hide. I appreciate the poignancy of his merciless culling because I realize the mental strength and resilience which he possesses to take a life away just like that. As if life was a possession… At the last thought, my emotions fired up and I cursed him for his indifference towards other people's lives: to put it simply. Because he never told me anything about his emotions or how he felt whenever he confiscated a life permanently and his stoic and unfeeling expression even hinting detest, I was always forced to assume that he thought that life was a material to be dealt without thought. Sometimes I wonder if he is still searching for me.

I emit the rare sigh (although my current feelings could allow me to release a thousand others). I doubt he would still be. Maybe it was because he always said I could leave him and his apparent indifference to whether I live (maybe even Jaken-sama) or not. I muse silently for a few minutes.

The moon today was larger than usual and there was this apparent stir in the forest beyond. I was sitting on the windy top of a hill which was located in proximity to my hut. The grass beneath me was wispy and I lay down my aching back to observe the sky again. This time in silence without any pondering. I rarely had the time for such an indulgence. The sky was littered with stars in random clusters and there was a sudden increase of Youki somewhere in the South-west direction. I could sense it because my Naginata was emitting pulsating vibrations and there was this stirring of the trees in that direction. The moon, it reminded me of him… I silently admitted, as much as I hated him, I had a small yearning that my master still continued to remember me.

"Sesshomaru-sama?"

"What?"

"If Rin were to die, will you promise that you won't forget me?"

-Hesitation-

"That's a foolish question."

-You will!-

"All right! Everybody back in NOW!"

I scrambled up and took a last longing glance to the south-west. My dark hair was picked up by the wind coming in that direction. I look towards the sky once again and something deep and unexplainable stirred from within the bowels of my soul. I had no inkling of what it was. I was yearning, longing and desiring for something and I felt in tatters. I did not know what I was missing. Wait- I don't think I was missing anything! I MISS NOTHING!

She lay under the night sky with no shadows of her past haunting her. She lay there observing the sky, as if longing and lusting for something. To him, she was just thinking about a deep matter. All women do that, he pondered. She got up and moved off after the damned Musashi called everyone back. His loud and low-tone voice broke the stillness which the scene radiated. It was a picture of beauty upon beauty to the silent observer. He waited in the shadows until Rin was away. And then he got up and moved off too.

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Wow! That was quick! Ok, I hope you guys enjoyed reading this. It's longer than the previous ones and I hope all of you are satisfied with the length. Don't forget to review ok? Another thing, please tell me if you want to hear more about Rin's training/Sesshomaru's life E.T.C in your reviews. I think I write too much about their opinions so the story basically has no background- aaargh, you know what I mean. Just comment ok? 

Thanks guys!

Jaa Ne!


	5. Growing New Wings

Hi Dear reader.

HEY! whatever happened to all my reviewers??? What happened to you guys? hah... Ok, I hope you guys review this chapter so that I know you are still reading this story.

Btw, thanks to DCOD for the suggestion.

Enjoy

* * *

The seal which keeps me free.

The heat! It bore into my skin with the intensity of thousands of hot spinning needles. The hills ahead of me, although they sprout hamanasu do not excite me… I feel… faint. It's all blurry- Oh no, now my head is paining me and I see spots! Millions of brilliant spots that dot my vision! I must not tell Sesshomaru-sama, he'll think me weak! I must not. I hack out a cough and yellow colored phlegm fell into my sweat-laced palms (A/N: eeew…). I cringe in disgust and drop to me knees. My head feels as if I'm being clamped…

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"Sesshomaru-sama?", a young, but tiny and raspy voice enquired.

"What?," came the slow, monotonous and almost bored reply.

A small smile dawned on the face of the owner of the young voice and she ran her frail palms through her raven black hair and shivered under the afternoon sun. The warmth of the sun made her skin prickle unnaturally and it was a sign that she was ailing. Rin thought Sesshomaru had not noticed her smile. However, his eyes caught her action and registered it as a human show of delight. Still, the expression plastered on his face did not change and he showed no sign of acknowledging young Rin's happiness. Actually, he was curious as to why she was smiling when he knew that she was ailing. He refused to bring her aid so as to see how far she would go before telling him.

"Sesshomaru-sama- " she continued hesitantly.

"I don't feel-" before Rin could finish her sentence, she heaved the contents of her stomach through her gullet and onto the grassy hill. Her mouth tasted the sour contents thoroughly and she sucked her already sallow cheeks. She knew she radiated wretchedness and weakness but she could no longer take the pain of her headache and the burning sensation in her throat and chest. Rin sniffed and doubled over with a small cry.

Sesshomaru looked at her with a hint of disgust on his face. For him to show even a hint of the emotion would mean that he was actually feeling VERY disgusted within, Rin mused. She knew why because the smell of the vomit was slowly rising with the heat and mixing with everyone's sweat and gave a stench to a degree that caused Rin to cringe. If it were that bad for her, it must have smelt far worse for her master.

"I'm sorry- Master, I couldn't-help it!" She cried. Hot tears burned her cheek and her tongue tasted an even wider array of unpleasant flavors. She felt so terrible and wretched. She felt pathetic and sorry for slowing everyone down.

"You are such a disgusting human! Rin! What do you want us to do now?" Jaken hollered at the shuddering mass that huddled at the foot of Sesshomaru who felt other than disgusted, amused. Rin could neither hear nor feel anything other than the quick pulses of her heart and the heat radiated from her master directly in front of her. She did not want do anything but continue to lie at his feet for an eternity as a literal example to differentiate the superiority between Youkais and humans.

"Rin." He spoke. It sounded like a command. Then again, he was always very demanding and had to have things done straight away. Yet, his softer tone indicated that he was slightly concerned for her. Rin smiled to herself and emitted a low hum as a response.

"Sesshomaru-sama! She can sit on Ah-Un! Ah-Un will carry the pathetic brat!" Jaken indicated, patting the dragon Youkai on its haunches. Ah-Un snorted at the physical touch.

Wordlessly, Sesshomaru kneeled down until he was slightly above Rin's trembling form. Rin could feel the heat radiated from his lean and muscular body and the hiccups that followed her tears quieted. Sesshomaru then leaned so close to her that Rin swore that she could actually feel his breath gracing her tiny neck (A/N: this ISN'T supposed to be romantic mind you. He's just really close to her THAT'S ALL). His hair was lifted by the wind and swirled around the both of them. Rin knew naught as to how to react but she felt strangely intimidated by him so she pressed her emaciated frame lower into the earth. Sesshomaru gave one of his trademark frowns. He muttered something, was it a curse? Under his breath and with his only arm, heaved Rin closer to his chest and cradled her and stood up. Rin gave a whimper surprise as she was expecting him to probably knock her head for slowing them down, not carry her. Then again, he has never really hit anyone other then Jaken. Rin felt his powerful muscles ripple as he clutched her tightly. His grip was nearly suffocating but she was too shell-shocked and sorry to move. He had never carried her before and almost never touched her so she was unused to, was it a rare display of- affection?! Luckily for Rin, she was too high above the ground to capture Jaken's unreadable expression; both of disgust and horror.

Rin dared to turn her head upward and she observed her master's facial contours. His jaw was set and slender with well pronounced angles. His face, for a fact was very angular because of his Youkai facial markings and demanding eyes. She attempted to read his expression silently. His jaw was aligned upwards as if he was observing the horizon ahead. Yet, his eyes were looking to the direct front and had an indignant glint. His eyebrows were held poised in dignity and it seemed that the aristocratic Youkai was exuding this appeal that commanded everyone to appreciate his majesty and magnificence. Rin hazarded a glimpse and observed the curve of his neck. She was appreciating the stillness of his face from a close proximity. Sesshomaru-sama seemed like one of the cleanest and most perfect pieces of kami's work; marred only by the absence of a left arm and his tainted reputation of blood and power lust.

Her headache seemed to have disappeared with the passing moments. She slowly allowed her heavy eyelids close. She drifted into a peaceful and simple dream of running through more fields of flowers. For once, she observed the pretentiously simple, peaceful and innocent aspects of life through her dream. Ironically, sleeping in the arms of a paradox of peace and innocence itself whose golden orbs had never ceased to observe her the moment he allowed her onto his arm.

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**Rin's POV**

I woke up today with a blinding head ache and it worried me at first as today was the fourth day of the moon. Meaning that today, we, the underling assassins, or the "Shitatsupa" as what we are known as are going to carry out "Ageru". Or, a tradition where we were to be screened and observed by the other teams in the village for our fouls and bad points. Those Shitatsupa who were unfortunate- No, pathetic enough to be singled out as inept were to undergo public flogging. At first when we the Shitatsupa were informed of this ancient tradition, many of the horrified majority immediately crumbled under the social and physical pressure. It was explained to us that the purpose of this exercise was to eliminate weakness and reinforce the perfection and strength of the art in which we practiced. To many of the Shitatsupa, the flogging signified that they were the runts of the village and those who were flogged were generally avoided. The wounds also became infected and the weaklings would reek: bad enough to drive the general population in the opposite direction. However, all victims of flogging survived long enough to feel the humiliation and drive themselves to form a resolution to work harder. I had witnessed the flogging and observed that those who cried out were flogged harder. I swore to myself, never to be caught as an underling. I would be then ruin the reputation I took so long to build that I was emotionally and physically strong; in ALL aspects.

The week before Ageru, I would train more intensely and push the physical boundaries of my strength further than before. Ageru's punishment was motivating enough to force even the laziest of sluggards to work taxingly. This would be the fifth and last time I carry out Ageru when next month, a few of other graduating Shitatsupa as well as myself would hunt for a dai-youkai to sacrifice for The Ordeal. After our augmentation, we would become real assassins.

This year for my Ageru, however, I have cause to worry. Firstly, my blinding head ache would definitely affect my standards and thirdly, many Shitatsupa who had graduated into real Shinobis were hot-headed and impulsive rogues who habitually patronized whore-houses outside the village frequent enough to have Yuragu telling them off and banning most of them from leaving the village. Yuragu usually paid no heed to what the assassins did outside the village but with the men frequenting the whore-houses, during the lustful nights, they gave out a wee to much information on our whereabouts. Many Shoguns and Daimyos were willing to pay their blood to control our force. Thus, Yuragu was selective of our clients. By having one of ours reveal information to the shogun's sluts would result in our downfall.

Anyway, I was damned because the lust-deprived rogues turn their attentions to those like me and thus I had to be on high-guard against them. Ever since that humiliating experience near the stream, I had been wary of all males, Youkai or human. Anyway, I had this sinking premonition that they would use Ageru as an excuse for me to sleep with them. I shuddered involuntarily and my stomach churned.

**Sesshomaru's POV**

Sesshomaru watched. He watched as the pitiable example of wretchedness crumbled into shredded pieces in front of him. He snorted in disgust as the creature's Shouki was exuded through its body in piercing hisses and spilled onto the ground in the form of purple vapors. Such a lowly youkai, Sesshomaru's lips curled in disgust although is face showed no literal expression when the dead youkai's severed arm twitched in a series of spasms. He observed the claw of his index finger for a moment and ran it through the hair that wisped in the breeze.

Such a force of ineffectiveness did not deserve to live on his father's territory. Sesshomaru turned his lean form in the opposite direction and took convinced steps towards the plains ahead of him. He was on a goal to rid his land of the scum which had defiled its magnificence. Starting with the lowly Youkai who had been paid by corrupt officials(all of which had been painfully annihilated through Sesshomaru's Tokijin) to commit treason and reveal stately secrets to the neighboring Shoguns. Sesshomaru scowled at the choice of worthless scum which five of his court officials had hired to carry the secrets.

He paused. Looking at the horizon which radiated orange warmth. Sesshomaru halted again. His sensitive nose picked up the delicate sent of Hamanasu drifting in the afternoon breeze. The same breeze had wafted through the locks on his fore head and flowed through his hair. Sesshomaru took the time to examine his right hand which was stained with the unholy presence of Youkai blood. Of course, he had spent the entire morning ridding the western lands of their presence and had not thought of wiping the grime from it. He still smelt panic within the blood on his hands and felt an unidentifiable urge, a strong urge to lick the blood off.

Lick the blood off… His mind seemed to pulsate with these hidden urges to continue in feral actions and Sesshomaru grunted in surprise at the urges. It was a long time since he had experienced such a compelling emotion (leaving out the incident at the forest). He let loose a deep moan as his inner self created dozens of arguments about what to do next. Sesshomaru's wild and feral urges now returned but with a greater force and battered at the forts of his mind with new found strength.

Why?! Sesshomaru's eyes smoldered a red color similar to the fury and intensity of the sun which lingered in the western sky. He felt the familiar increase of Youki and the increased production of adrenaline in his blood. His blood coursed faster and faster and gave him the feeling of intoxication. Sesshomaru gripped his Tenseiga in a deadly lock. He did not need to change now and yet his body was compelling him to do so! The wind around him was picking up and Sesshomaru's mind and body were contradicting each other. His body, compelling and aching him to change yet his mind objecting and preventing it. It gave him a terrible headache. Sesshomaru could feel his canines lengthening and the tension of his muscles…

Stop!!! He beseeched, to his own body. He begged himself not to loose control.

Begging himself? The thought itself seemed to calm Sesshomaru's body as it immediately stopped the lust to change and Sesshomaru fell to his knees. The sun was almost beginning to set but to the dai-youkai, it seemed only like seconds where his ordeal occurred. He remained on his knees, ignoring the fact that he was on a pitiable position with his arm hanging limp at his side, his head angled downward. An invisible force seemed to be building on his shoulders and he recognized it as the pressures of ruling his society. He needed to return to his citadel after settling all conflicts and think about producing an heir. An idea he refused to look into. Other then that unsettling issue, he also had to consider other stately affairs such as the impending danger of Shoguns and their armies. Sesshomaru scowled at the humans who knew naught about the place in society. The shoguns frequently tested the patience of his as well as other Youkai lords by frequently conquering new lands. Sesshomaru could defeat them with his Tokijin, that, he was sure off. However, their presence became more and more of an irking nuisance. Just like a flea which you refused to acknowledge until it has sucked your blood dry. There were also those mercenaries and assassins which assaulted his lands from within often taking scores of villages with motivation from the high pay from other Shoguns. He would deal with the menacing force later,

He was tired. Yes, he allowed himself to be humbled for once. Ever since he had given up on Rin, his ego had taken a bleak tumble. That was probably why he was literally begging himself not to change his form and experience the care-free life of a common mutt. He laughed sardonically and bitterly drove the sharp claws on his fingers into his palms; drawing even more blood. Now he was calling himself a mutt. The only mutt in disgusting existence that he knew was his pathetic half brother that since Naraku's demise, had disappeared from the Warring Era. Sesshomaru thought him dead but cared naught about him anymore. He was unused to defeat but four years after loosing the human girl, he experienced personal loss after personal loss. Yes, he still could defeat a battalion with only his light whip. However, the only thing that he frequently lost to was the inner beast which had woken up within him and the restricting image of Rin which was the only other thing besides Tenseiga which kept him from loosing his mind.

The exhausted but indignantly proud Dai-Youkai settled himself under a tree and observed the flaming sky in silence. Yes. He definitely was no longer in top shape mentally (physically, he was stronger). Zen: both mental and physical must be at peace, if one gains, the other looses.

Sesshomaru scowled. What? Now I must loose the brawn which I had dedicated so long to training just to regain a healthy mental state? Sesshomaru frowned: Amazed that he still had the energy to create lame jokes.

---

**Rin's POV**

The headache seemed to have gotten worse and I stumbled out of my hut and into the warm sunlight. Judging from the position of the sun, it was late morning and I had little time to prepare. I felt a single drop of cold sweat trickle down my forehead and I gave a moan of despair. Yuragu and the ancient assassins that supervised this village were not known to accept sickness as an excuse to skip Ageru. I cried in exasperation as my sight became was dotted with colorful spots. It was blinding and confusing me.

I spotted the rogues out of the pained corner of my eye and shot them a look which I was sure, made them scamper in the opposite direction. The spots have cleared out and I found that I had bent over in an awkward position like a drunkard. I mentally berated myself for doing that. Despite the nausea and confusion which the dizzying headache brought, however, I continued rejoicing in ultimate sadism. Somehow, I knew that I would be flogged today. Since I could not change my fate, I might as well resign myself to it and try to seek the good of my future judgment.

"Pain is good… it toughens your soul and strips the spirit of conceit and egotism" As I quote directly from Sesshomaru-sama who had once told me to stop crying after I carelessly twisted an ankle while searching for hamanasu for my Lord. I presented to him the flowers as well the throbbing ankle; teary-eyed and shivering. I remember him giving me a frosty frown and walking off, leaving me there. I felt horrible- if horrible was apt enough to describe my emotions. I remember hobbling after my Lord who, I'm sure had increased his walking pace with Jaken rambling persistently and refusing to allow me to sit on Ah-Un. I thrust the bundle of flowers at the feet of my Lord which were quickly walking away from me and collapsed; unable to bear the ache both emotionally and physically. I faintly recall my Lord stopped and even bothered to turn to me. The only clear memory etched into my head forever is lying face down on Ah-Un's rump; moving away from a faint bundle of the color pink, white and yellow. The pain in my right ankle soon felt intoxicating and I felt the throb spread to the rest of my being. After intense pain, the feeling sadistically warped into a hot and even comforting feeling. These, were the earliest incidences which I could recall where I started to understand the world better. I was introduced to a new acquaintance who I had seen many times before. Whenever I see him, I always cringe and cower. Now that Pain and I have been introduced, I think of him as a nice person who, if you understand him well enough, will bring you immense pleasure. These were my earliest thoughts of sadism as well as masochism.

Well, I cared naught for the humiliation save for being seen as weak in the eyes of others. The pain would toughen me and I swear, the moment the thick locks of entwined rope and metal grace my back, I swear and swear to Kami, I shall seal my lips shut and entertain the guest Pain. I will get to know him more. Perhaps, we will become lovers.

I laugh sarcastically and shamble to the quadrangle to find Musashi. I admit, I need courage from my team leader. I feel with the presence of my team leader Musashi, I will be able to calm my mind and achieve peace with both body and mind to meet my old friend Pain again.

**Sesshomaru's POV**

I meandered through the long and winding corridors of the citadel which my ancestors had spent so long building. In fact, this stronghold is so ancient that it goes eras beyond the Sengoku Jidai. Thus, much of the castle's decorum is eclectic from the different periods. To my indifference, this castle was built for pleasure, not siege. The main wall of defense was elaborate and classy. However, the old and rotted stone and mould from the years posed as not much a better defense as compared to paper.

I had spent the vulnerable days of my youth within these walls studying the ancient text of the land I exist in. Thus, I have abundant knowledge of the common geographical features which mark my father's territory: the Western Lands. Such an elaborate castle is of little use to me. I admit it as a fact that I am a proud Dai-Youkai but such luxury is disgusting. Only useless Daimyos and Shogun lords need the luxury to cover up their weaknesses. They think that by smothering their lives with extravagance and lavishing themselves, the useless heimin would think of them as rich and powerful. Power is not measured in money and I highly doubt that anyone of them know how to correctly wield a katana and swing without spraining their pathetic human wrists. I do not wish for anybody to underestimate this Sesshomaru.

I am currently without a task to do, mainly because I refuse to hold any conversations with anyone at the moment. A servant scuttles past me and when she brushes against my moko-moko-sama, her scent lingers on the adornment. I catch the scent of stress and panic.

Ohoh, so this is what my servants- rather, my father's servants are trained to carry whenever they are around a Lord. I need no servants. The smell of sweat and the hint of oil lingered on me too long for my liking and I snarl at the apologetic wretch who turned around and fell to her knees on a bow much deeper than the protocol demanded. I maintain a stoic facial expression but if my disposition allowed me to, I would snickered and spat at her for all that she was worth. I always wondered why servants were all so bland and monotonous; this one especially. It irked me.

She must have smelt my amusement because she quickly scuttled backwards. I cared naught and I paced towards my destination, The Armory chamber. I intend to study the weapons to see if they were fit to be used to "protect" this in-pregnable fortress.

Regarding in-pregnable- I come to an abrupt halt and the balls of my feet grind into the wooden slats that made the floor. I could hear the atmosphere quiet save for the sound of my joints swaying in the position to hold me up. I had to choose a mate soon… an ominous cloud swirled from the depths of my soul and I chocked. My eyes widened and a felt it glint in defiance.

I quickly regain my composure; brutally reminding myself of my social status by driving my sharp claws deep into the flesh of my palms. It was a ruse to help me remember, but a ruse, nonetheless to help me keep myself from loosing the demanding presence I have upon others. I use my eyes to read others like an open book.

I can infiltrate the frail or strong fortress which many place around their eyes and enter the throne room of the citadel with ease. I will slowly savor destroying the king, or – reading the mind of my target. Once I have destroyed the king, I claim the castle. Just like once I have read their mind, I know that I have been placed in a position of high respect in their eyes; a position high above the target itself.

Rin- the only person who has never guarded her eyes against me. I understood her mind as easily as I could crush her frail body with my hand. I understood the depths and comprehension. Why she chose to allow me to read her only, I cannot comprehend as much as I detest admitting. She always put up a good defense when interacting with other people. I observed that she sealed the gateway to her mind with the strongest and best defense and perhaps after training and time, stronger then mine. I always ponder upon why she allows me to examine her whenever I observe the night sky when the rest of my party is resting. I searched the celestial universe for an answer and this was my strongest conviction:

She allowed me to enter her mind, yes; but at a price. Gullible as I was to access her further, I finally came to the strongest conclusion as to why, why she allowed me to read her. It was like a Taisho holding a castle on siege, he comes to the fortress with his best fighters and when he sights the citadel, the doors and gates are wide open. The bemused, intrigued and somewhat gullible Taisho enters the gates and sights no enemy soldier to attack and conquer. Slowly, he lowers his guard and his motive for entering the castle slowly changes form conquering it to trying to understand the whole rationale for allowing such an easy defeat. He is suspicious but not on his guard as he can sense no trouble. He enters the throne room to find him received as a guest wit the highest honor. He paces towards the Queen aware of all the servants retreating. He meets her with a determined face, determined to conquer her. The queen returns the bold expression and she intrigues him greatly with her beauty and poignancy. Her existence intrigues the Young Taisho and he realized and he could not kill her. He turns around, to see his best fighters on the floor in pools of crimson blood, murdered not by the soldier dressed as a servant, but by their lowered guard. The Taisho turns around in bewilderment and realizes his pitiable fate. The queen raised her silver coated dagger and smiles sadistically.

"Taisho, you attempt to read me and I allowed you to-"

She raises her dagger-

"-only for a few moments, my honorably naive Taisho, before my troops seize your un-guarded castle and then I slit your throat."

She slices.

Rin allowed me to read her, but by slowly understanding the fathoms of her mind, I left the gates of my citadel open. She then slowly read me without my acknowledging of it. I scowl at my bluntness and drive my claws deeper and deeper into my flesh. Blood drips onto the floor in slow and pained trickles.

Hah- Rin is the only mortal who knows how deep my soul has driven itself to, no one else. We Youkai are not immortal. On this earth, immortal is non-existence.

I seem to be falling for last minute urges, I mused after I pulled myself out of the subject about Rin. I had completely forgotten about the more prominent topic of an heir. I despised that topic. Now, I had the urge to change into my other form, he third time since Rin's death. Changing allowed this Sesshomaru a humble form of escape from my duties. For the third time, I was avoiding thinking of my duties.

I curse kami for making me the son of a Taisho.

Now, I act like a coward and escape my duties rather then assault them.

A coward? This Sesshomaru will never admit to being a coward.

You are not a coward! you will face this problem, but later on. It is not an urgent matter now. Now, enjoy your last breaths of freedom before your duties call.

I moan as my conscience start debating again.

I choose transforming. Like I said, I am not a coward, and- I am not choosing to procrastinate. I will merely attempt the situation on a more appropriate date. I cough: something I do only when I am alone.

I turned around to the direction of the scent of trees.

I heard the wispy and indecisive tone of my fate murmuring and hinting to my ear

"_You can run-"_

"_-But you can't hide"_

* * *

Oooh… now Sesshie is like this drug addict who turns to changing as a source of escape… ooh.

haha, ok... hope you liked it. If you want to read what happens to Rin during Ageru... well... you'll have to revieew! aand wait a while. Don't worry, it'll come soon. I type these chapters pretty fast. Somehow, there's been this problem with the mailing system so all the alerts are late. Argh.

Jaa Ne!


	6. Distance makes the heart grow fonder

Hi again!

I apologize about all storyline loopholes and inconsistencies in the previous

chapters.

Oh yeaah, I received feedback from someone saying that it's confusing when I suddenly switch characters so I have decided to put a border whenever I do do. I hope it'll neaten up stuff.

Disclaimer: I own nothing…!!. sobs, I own… nothing.

Oh, the woes of age.

* * *

I staggered towards the quadrangle under the sweltering heat of the mid-day sun which made its mark on the azure blue sky. In the distance, vast mirages appeared on the open ground and I sought solace within the gathering crowds of fellow Shitatsupa. The whole wretched horde of Shitatsupa also seemed to feel the intense heat and they swaggered in randomly littered groups of two to three; as if attempting to escape the scorching sun's rays by clustering and hiding in each other's shadows. I scowl and attempt to find refuge under a scraggly and dying Sakura bough. I glanced at the motley assembly of rookies and quietly amused myself at their "attempts" to keep cool. Many of them refused to use their Shugenja skills in fear of tiring themselves unnecessarily. We, the Shitatsupa were informed to assemble an hour before Ageru and apparently, the standards of many more Shitatsupa would be challenged today. My headache seemed to be kicking up speed and it was as if an Oni war was being raged within my head and the combatants were ramming around my insides. My stomach also felt the stress. I raised a finger to my temple and rubbed it, closing my eyes painfully, I focused on my Center: The innermost part of my physical, mental as well as spiritual being. My sensei has taught me to focus my strength on the center and allow it to build towards the outside. Thus, you develop a strong center and battle stance, leaving you unbreakable. This, for me was a relatively effortless task as compared to other Shitatsupa; some of which visibly showed the mental strain of focusing on their centers. I snigger. How stupid, sending a message to your enemy that you will beat him when you have trouble even focusing. My headache made my focal point waver. After a moment of attempting to center myself, which was futile, I gave up. Opening my eyes, however, I was greeted by the unwaveringly rude, intrusive and bold eyes of Maroon nature staring into my eyes.

"Bakka!"

I shrieked and booted the intruder of my personal space with the ball of my right foot. My foot met the firm and textured muscles which ironically lined the stomach of a notoriously lazy and dynamic playboy, ex-Shitatsupa. He however caught my ankle and held my foot- fine, I admit, leg- in midair. If I had not been busy focusing myself as well as the added effect of my headache, I would have been able to avoid the grasp- or should I say grope. The rogue had the audacity to plant a lingering kiss on my shin and I swore at him. I was to tired to kick his face which radiated narcissism but I only refrained because if I did , I would badly effect the economy of many whore houses in the Osaku precinct. He, being a male was also equipped with a larger mass of brawn then I. Unfortunately; he had also been given the gift of sharp wit which miraculously could be compared to me. He, unlike I used the gift to seduce women into the nooks of his futon. Thus, after the years, the space in his mind rotted away and left a chasm of nothingness. He became a shallow and pretentious being. If I could not overcome him physically, I would slaughter him mercilessly with my other sword-sharp tongue and wit. His mouth stretched into a lengthy grin-scowl. He had tied his long and wispy black hair into a top knot and his fringe came down in a sharp contrast to his pale face, the color of the moon. One of his sharp canines revealed itself on the tip of his mouth and his eyes were strikingly maroon in color. He was an Inu-dai-youkai. However, he lacked the intricate facial markings like Sesshomaru, probably because he was not even half of my old master's age. I gave Yazu a foul scowl and shook my leg at his physical touch. Since when had he been so bold? Many of the females in the village fall prey to his "charms" but I saw none of it within his eyes. The eyes, though striking in color held no significant amount of depth and to me; he was just a shell, or puppet with no soul, or no strings.

"Yazu, how have you come to possess such assets?" I offered the bait. Yazu looked at me with a certain curiosity. Had he failed to catch the hint of sarcasm which lightly frosted my words?

"Are you impressed by them, if you feel the need to get to know them closer, I will-" No, he hadn't. He slid his arm higher and when it reached my knee, I seized the opportunity to use my defiled shin to knock his chin, hard enough to force him to retain his wandering arm. Shin and Chin go leg-in-face, I sniggered at the lame joke I probably created to boost my flailing ego.

"They were probably acquired with the many nights of exercise offered by the whores in Osaku, no?" I snarled. I felt that I did not wish to waste time with the wretch so I cut to the point.

He caught the gist. His mask of cool and testosterone-driven expressions died away into a wretched snarl of malice.

"If you have not already figured out, Rin-SAMA"- he placed an emphasis on the Sama-

"I intend to use Ageru to acquire you." His coy hand once again wandered up my legs. This time, I could reach for my Naginata and with lightning reaction; I unsheathed it and placed its tip on the bobbing protrusion on his throat. He ceased the actions and froze for a second.

"I can slice you here, Yazu and give the economy of the whore houses in Osaku major problems- where in Japan will they find such a patronizing customer?" I used my free hand to silently stroke the frozen expression on his face; silently mocking him, daring him to come closer to me and get slaughtered by my Naginata. I sniggered inwardly at the irony of the situation I had just created. Although he had pinned me to the bough of the tree in an awkward position for both of us, I was in control. I wondered what his next movement would be. He pulled a long and chilling smile onto his face.

"Rin, since I know how you are, I will go straight to the point." His eyes lingered on my legs with a long look of lust and desire. I edged my Naginata higher and brought him back to reality.

"If you refuse to become mine, I will call your name during Ageru. Oh, I will call your name and revel in your cold and icy expression. I want you tonight Rin. Allow me to." He drawled. I was taken aback by his prissy and blunt show of "affection".

"Just as how you have lusted for the rest of the sluts in this village; you will never have that desire fulfilled, Yazu. Thus, I imply that you annihilate all thoughts of being with me in your mind." I retorted.

"Not that you have a mind in that filthy body of yours which you so freely share with everyone." I silently added for only the ears of the kami to hear. However, the holy message meant for Kami had leaked to earth and into the sensitive ears of the Inu-Dai-Youkai, Yazu. I watched in his shadow as his rage fumed. His facial expression changed so drastically that I could not describe it. There was an untamed feral element in his eyes and for a moment, I thought his face had elongated and he was growing a sharper set of canines. The Youki and the area also seemed to have increase. However, it was only second and Yazu started to pant. Probably in rage of what the sentence had meant.

"Yazu? Are you angry at being told of what you actually do? What I said is merely a hint of what your reputation depicts." I whispered into his ear and I could sense the emotional conflict raging beneath his skin. His scent was of musk and I recoiled in disgust.

He slapped me. Hard, across the face and my neck ached from the impact of my head twisting. I reacted by kicking hard into his abdomen and sent him reeling backwards, away from me. I refused to raise a hand to inspect the throbbing right cheek which his filthy hands had defiled to hide any signs of weakness of pain.

"I will have you Rin! It's either that, OR, you will be whipped, bare-back by Yuragu!" he stuttered with a maniacal grin riding high onto his cheek bone. He staggered away.

"I would rather be flogged by kami then to have a night in your Futon! Ishigiro, Yazu." I mused silently and kneaded the swelling cheek and half-smiled and winced at the pain.

"Sorry Yazu, I have another lover, Pain. Although my love Pain patronizes every living being, he visits me and loves me most of all people. Unlike you, he has a favorite whom he frequently returns to. Unlike you, I reciprocate Pain's love." I muttered, walking away from the knobby Sakura bough and fixing my hair into a tight tress.

"_Unlike you, Pain has affected me Physically, Mentally and Spiritually."_

The sun's heat was not as bad and my headache seemed to be dying off. I smile under the warmth which came from Pain's embrace. In think, my only true friend is Pain himself.

**

* * *

**

**Sesshomaru's POV**

Silently, I hustled through the long and winding corridors of my citadel, in desperate need to locate my Taisho, Tatsuyama Kanto. I had received news from reconnaissance in the southern lands that a new breed of impending danger threatens my lands towards the south. Apparently, the Daimyos of the Lion Clan which inhabited the Southern lands had hired a team of assassins in an attempt to infiltrate my lands through the south. My citadel was inevitably targeted. I needed to discuss matters of defence with the Taisho. After my father's death two-hundred and fifty-nine years ago, the title had been given to me. However, on my respectably futile journey of attempting to find a greater strength and attempting to eliminate the half-brother which had inherited the great sword Tetsusaiga, I blatantly refused the offer. Thus, for the next few centuries, the western lands grew vulnerable to outsiders with no Taisho to lead them. Henceforth, I became the errant Prince of the western lands who was shunning his duty towards his homeland. Now, as I find myself older and wiser, I silently regret rejecting the offer. I realised how foolish I had been in my youth: Disregarding the work in which my father had done to make my lands prosper and showing no loyalty to the blood which courses through me. My ancestors had spent millenniums building this ancient empire and now, I, Sesshomaru disregard the works and effort put into creating this work of art for the life of a selfish vagabond, desperate to gain a greater power which he could never have. I was denying myself a home, riches, and a title on a conquest for greater power. Now, two-hundred and fifty-nine years after I left the title and after I left my home on a journey to change myself, I returned home to a superficial and soulless kingdom.

I had been observing the western lands from the outside, during my journeys and I was amazed, at first at how the western lands seemed to cope without a Taisho. How foolish I was. The remaining court had managed to weave an intricate fabrication of deceit and propaganda which had been spread to the gullible heimin into thinking that the western lands had flourished and had an army of ten-thousand Youkai, ready to battle and to conquer. Now that I am older, I am able to locate the loopholes in the conspiracy I had so willingly accepted when I was younger. After I, the Errant Prince returned home after my long Journey, I had expected a court well-ruled with judgement. How wrong I was. It was as if I peeled open the skin of a peach which had a flawless exterior only to find its insides infested with worms and disease. No wonder the peach had not been touched neither were there other peaches near its surroundings. The foul interior was rotten to an extent that it created a poison which prevented other peaches from growing near it. Somehow, the western land's polluted court had spread poison and prevented outsiders from attacking us. That was the only thing I credited my old court for: spreading propaganda to prevent attacks. They also enable me to understand how useless, weak and gullible human Taisho and Daimyos from neighbouring lands were.

I immediately eliminated the poison in my court and this caused a minor uproar within the lower branches of the hierarchy. How could a traitor return after him being missing during the western land's 'Darkest Days' and eliminating all the factors that had caused it to be a war-free area. Yes, the heimin were fed and there was no war. But, the court was a bunch of useless slobs who were skilled at nothing but weaving fabrication. I returned and silenced all who opposed me with the justification of paying my last tributes to my dead Chichi-ue.

Just before my return, a new Taisho had been appointed, only for the purpose of filling my position in court. The clever court-officials heard rumours of my impending return after Naraku's demise and found a sudden need to appoint a Taisho to prevent my homecoming. I returned, of course with little fear of what political upheaval I could cause if I annihilated more than half of all my corrupt court officials. I kept those who were weak and feeble in nature. They would be the safest to keep around in court. A few well-placed threats and rumours would keep them in their position. The Taisho who had replaced me, Tatsuyama Kanto had a keen mind. Although I daresay he will not beat me in the mind games I play. We were, however, on par at swordsmanship and our skills in the court were levelled. I allowed him to live if he kept obedient and under the promise that he would never instigate a coup. Thus, I always had to be one step ahead of him if he wanted to keep his head attached to his body and my dignity strapped firmly to my soul. The Taisho, however, had a reputation for useless banter as well as an unsurpassable ego. I understand him for I have an equally high ego. However for him, his arrogance is not backed up with adequate intelligence. Thus, I feel that I must do something one of these days.

Many of the heimin were happy for my return. They are a gullible but hardworking lot. Since the mass of them had an impact on court ruling, I was to be placed on an unnamed rank above Taisho Tatsuyama Kanto: the first political exception in the history of the western land courts. Tatsuyama-San and I were on respectable terms and our relationship was clearly for business only. Jaken was placed as the court scribe since he was the only one I could grudgingly trust out of all to rely on. Ever since he was appointed for such a role, Jaken has kept to his duty and thankfully, out of my sight and hearing range.

I scowled as I caught a glimpse of the burning sun riding high into the sky. It was nearing the end of mid-day and the sky had grown a crimson colour, much like the colour of the flamboyant colours which marked the "humble" kimonos of court maidens who escorted foreign ambassadors and certain court officials.

By the time I had located my Taisho, the Sun was hiding beyond the cloudy mountain range towards the west.

"Taisho Tatsuyama-San!" I demanded with a level of evitable annoyance and impatience. The Taisho had been practicing his Iaijitsu in the southern courtyard of the citadel which was a small courtyard which was placed out of the way for private training meant for high officials. I had caught Taisho Tatsuyama in an intricate sword battle move and I realized that my sudden barking command disrupted the stillness which had been radiated from the Taisho's katana. It was sharp and precise, but contained no Youki: a useless human katana, to me.

-

Sesshomaru's tone gave a clear implication of his purpose of confronting the Taisho.

"Hai, Shogun Sesshomaru-Sama." Taisho Tatsuyama replied with the grace which only faired slightly better then what the protocol demanded. He returned his Katana to its Saya and performed a shallow bow. The Taisho arched an eyebrow and the corners of his mouth widened in a near snigger, of course, he did not snigger.

Sesshomaru quirked an eyebrow at the Taisho giving him the title Shogun, nevertheless, he kept quiet.

There was a moment of mutual silence between the two Youkai and Sesshomaru observed a crisp and red leave drift through the breeze to land not-so-silently on he ground. His sensitive Youkai ears picked up the soft and suggestive rustling. Sesshomaru lead his thought-weary mind back to important issues. The Taisho seemed to have been listening to the softness in the breeze to appreciate the dying breaths of summer as well. The two Youkai stood in appreciation for a while, until humanity and its burdens dragged the weary trekkers of the long journey of life back onto the long and winding road.

"Tatsuyama-San," Sesshomaru continued, this time softer but with an increased tension of pressure.

Tatsuyama turned to look at his superior without as much as a predictable expression on his face. Tatsuyama knew the tactics of the court well enough to manipulate the fact that Sesshomaru hated being compared to humans.

"You would have heard of the threat of assassins which rise from the south." Sesshomaru cut straight to the point a skipped all formal introductions. The afternoon was wearing on and neither Youkai had the intention of staying late with their thin nerves. Tatsuyama flinched at the abruptness and bluntness of Sesshomaru's implementation.

"Hai, Shogun Sesshomaru-Sama," Sesshomaru's lips twitched and he licked the tip of his right fang.

"The security of the castle has been wound up a notch. So has the security on the lands towards the south." Tatsuyama breathed quickly, sensing Sesshomaru's irritable mood. Sesshomaru flicked a finger through his long white trails of hair and considered the Taisho's words. Sesshomaru had an unpredictable temperament, as Tatsuyama had been warned by the courtiers. Nevertheless, Tatsuyama, being a man never to believe rumours decided to test Sesshomaru out himself to see him worthy of his respect. There was another long and painful moment of silence. Tatsuyama was agitated and fidgety with the long wait. Sesshomaru's demanding and intriguing presence was enough to unnerve the Taisho to a certain extent. After all, this was the first time he had been confronted by Sesshomaru, alone. The Taisho waited in ordered silence and cringed when Sesshomaru's intense gaze lingered on his own eyes. It was as if Sesshomaru was manipulating time to intimidate and bewilder. Something like minutes past and the Taisho was well aware that Sesshomaru was observing him and clearly not pondering about the information he had just received. The Taisho shifted uneasily on his feat and stood awkwardly. No amount of training from courtiers could prepare one for such intense pressure, only time and experience could groom a Youkai into such a self-assured, independent and honourable position.

Tatsuyama gave an uneasy cough. Sesshomaru quirked his head, a minute glint resounded from the depths of his eyes and slowly, he eased the conversation into a safer and calmer stream.

"Taisho-San, the western lands needs more than just defence do you think? We must attempt to remove the source of discomfort." Sesshomaru eased the weary and agitated Taisho into an uncomfortable agreement. Slowly, but surely, Sesshomaru won the battle of the wits between him and Taisho Tatsuyama. Sesshomaru was indifferent; he had seen this scene beyond count.

"H-Hai, Sesshomaru-sama. However, my Lord, we lack resources and unit training to carry out surveys on the offending team, my Lord. We lack skilled swordsmen in Ninjitsu-Bushi"

Sesshomaru noted the use of "my Lord" in Tatsuyama's speech. Tatsuyama was a mountain of rice, large in appearance, yet when exposed to rain and the elements: rots away to form the insignificant soil which everyone tramples upon. Tatsuyama, however, had not completely lost his esteem and was not willing to be tamed by another elaborately dressed Youkai. Apparently, Tatsuyama had never seen Sesshomaru's Tenseiga or Tokijin

"Quieten, Taisho." Sesshomaru muttered stoically, although, arguably annoyed to an extent. He was in no mood to challenge and flatten an equal in-ego-today; if he had to, he would do it quickly and brutally. Their meeting had taken so long that the Sun was dimmed and the flaming afternoon sky would soon dissolve into a starless night as predicted by the court Philosophers whom Sesshomaru paid no regard to.

"Kisama Yarou, if what your reputation proclaims, you are apt in wit and strong in the blade. Taisho, why do you not follow me? Of course I have known that MY lands lack the skills to train those to act as infiltration. Come one, Kisama, play my mind game with me! Play! Play!" Sesshomaru urged. He was annoyed and angry as he viewed the Taisho's impossible ego come crashing down from the heavens in great flames, tumbling down back to earth and remaining in a heap of rubble. He suddenly felt like humiliating the fool for establishing such high standards, standards that exceeded Sesshomaru. Tatsuyama detected a wild and feral element in Sesshomaru and he was startled, with the hint of fear. He was smart enough to understand that his Lord was manipulating him, but how? His mental compatibility could not allow him to comprehend.

"What would you like me to… do?" Tatsuyama stuttered. Sesshomaru seemed as if he was nearly about to sigh.

"I will do the work in surveying the lands. What training have I been doing all these years away form my citadel, you fool?"

Tatsuyama had no idea as to how to reply. Of course, it was a rhetorical question! Tatsuyama had reverted his expression into a composed one and it reflected Sesshomaru's icy glare. At least he could still keep up his game of relating Sesshomaru to the Shogun.

"Shog-" Tatsuyama was abruptly cut off by Sesshomaru's lazy flick of the hand. The light whip created a graceful arc above the two Youkai for a moment and reached around the back of Tatsuyama. A short snap sounded and half of the top-not which collected Tatsuyama's thick locks of hair fell from its place. Tatsuyama gawked in horror as Sesshomaru had merely confiscated the last aspects of a Youkai Taisho's esteem and honour. Sesshomaru turned his back to the Taisho and lazily sauntered away.

If he had to, he would do it quickly and brutally.

"Tatsuyama-San, you KNOW how much I dislike being associated with the Shogun: The damage done to my pride is worth more then that top-knot on your hair." Sesshomaru yawned and allowed a smirk to grace his face. He had crushed Tatsuyama in his game, crushed Tatsuyama's esteem and had conquered another unclaimed territory in the court. That was his other purpose to pay the Taisho a visit.

Tatsuyama fell to his knees; unable to comprehend what social humiliation he had just undergone. Sesshomaru peered back at the wretchedness radiated from Tatsuyama's form. A quick shimmer from the shadows meant that Tatsuyama had been shedding silent tears; shedding the last of his pride. Sesshomaru paused.

"Don't cry Taisho, you will leave the last fragments of your ego in the dust." Sesshomaru warned.

"You have already taken away everything my Lord…" Tatsuyama quivered. Sesshomaru felt an overwhelming level of disgust for Tatsuyama and was incredulous at how his Taisho could so easily be demoralised. Sesshomaru was forced to cut his lower-rank's top-knot to remind Tatsuyama of his place.

"Fear not Taisho, I prefer my pawns humble." Sesshomaru diplomatically stated and left before he could hear the Taisho's reply.

* * *

Yes, I admit to be arrogant. No one denies that. Arrogance does not destroy one as long as he has wisdom to support it. Only a fool is arrogant and ignorant. I merely did the Taisho a favour in aiding him to recognise his mistake. I tested him and I think he understood my meaning: Tatsuyama would realise himself a mere pawn, as all Taisho are. Tatsuyama would also recognise that arrogance was only reserved for those in control. Servants or pawns had no say in such a game.

"…_I prefer my pawns humble"_

"…_I could not agree more… My Lord!"_

* * *

"Ano…are…ano…. Sesshomaru-sama?"

The stuttering toad Youkai had been trailing me half the afternoon. Of course, I never failed to miss his high-pitched and scratchy voice quality stuttering and muttering expressions to catch my attention. I just wanted to see how long the idiot would follow me before he gave up. That would allow me to judge how grave a matter was. It was always like this between Jaken and me; I, of course have gotten used to it first.

"Se-Sessh- Sessshoooomaruuu…-Saamaa!!" Jaken finally howled my name in anguish and collapsed into a heap of shuddering bones and skin. I stopped. I had already wasted half of my time trying to ward off the stench which trailed me.

"Jaken." I muttered the name, not even putting in effort to move the pelt residing on my right shoulder to reward my pursuer with a glance. This was how much I did not want to be bothered. Let this be a warning to all my court members, I mused. Jaken sat up and shuffled to my side. My ears picked up a hustled sigh and I smirked. I moved my right foot forward slowly and menacingly, threatening to move away from the tired Jaken.

"Chotto Matte Kudasai, My Lord." Jaken blabbered and his look of exhaustion which he pathetically lobbed to me drove me to remain still. I quirked an eyebrow and tilted my chin: my age old expression to urge someone to continue.

"My Lord…" Jaken fumbled with his words and I was frustrated. I nudged him with my Jikai-Tabi. Yes, I was being unfair to the Youkai who had been so diligently trailing me. However, it was his fault for failing to understand how I prefer direct people.

"My Lord, please consider what I am about to say," Jaken muttered a sentence which caught my attention.

"You may continue-"I hesitantly allowed him to speak. Jaken turned his head to the corridor where I sensed an assembly of Youkai.

"My Lord, the court urges you to consider the issue of an heir…" Jaken mumbled and cowered, probably expecting me to hit him. I of course had known that this matter would catch up with me one day. I will never fully escape from my duties. I knew the basic rationale for an heir but I was curious as to the court's ulterior motive to get me a mate.

"Jaken, for what reason must I address such a matter at the present moment? The state of this country does not declare that I have to wed. I see no foul in producing an heir about two centuries to the future…"

"Well, my Lord, after your return, neighbouring Shoguns and Daimyos have understood the fallacies and lies relayed to them during you absence. We must thank the heavens for keeping your father's land safe in your absence! After your return, our reconnaissance has reported that many clans are toying with the idea of testing the defence of the western lands to see if we are really of what the rumours depict us. In my opinion my Lord, they are attacking us for insulting their intelligence because they readily believed the old court's excuses… How the old court managed to do that, I don't know!"

I did not listen to Jaken's account of his opinion on why the neighbouring Lords wanted to attack my Lands. I kicked Jaken so as to shut him up as well as to remind him that the western lands are now mine, not my fathers. When Jaken told me about the issue of the Shogun and Daimyo threat, I did not have to think hard to understand the courts opinion about me. They think that I am like a weak Shogun who is skilled in talk but weak in the sword. Thus, they fear that if I die in a siege (Which is extremely unlikely because if I die by a human sword, I will individually curse myself to the lowest punishment of being reborn repeatedly into miserable lives) there would be no heir and the western lands would once again be plunged into a dark era. A fault which lies within the blood of my ancestors as well as me and my descendants is that we have a level of arrogance which was cursed never to be humbled. The arrogance would eventually kill us. The western lands have always supported it without relying on outsiders and I do not wish to bother with studying the ways of how this land has been successfully ruled. I am content with the job of merely eliminating the scum which make my land foul, amending rules and orders as well as putting neighbouring Shoguns and Daimyos in their place. I do not even require fame and acknowledgement. I, unlike my ancestors enjoy all success which is made by me only. I am satisfied by only the primary prize of what I have accomplished and I have no need for the other rewards which come after accomplishing my goal.

"Jaken, the court will understand how I am not easily killed by humans. They will understand. I will make them beseech for my forgiveness when they realize that I have understood their impure rationale for me to produce an heir. I will re-enforce my primary reasons for not having an heir: the time does not call for one, I will not die so easily AND the threat of the Shoguns and Daimyos would be crushed centuries before my demise." I put extra effort into increasing my volume and dripping a concoction of sarcasm and indifference onto my words. I walked off after sensing the mass of Youkai behind the corner shrink back. My point has found a way into their thick skulls.

I smirk as my ears picked up traces of the heated conversation between Jaken and the court officials.

"_He's just a coward. Kami has made us such that no one is afraid of nothing. He's afraid of what many of us long for."_

"_Pah, the brave Sesshomaru, afraid of Children?"  
_

"_Bakka… he's weary of a loving a person. For what reason, I cannot understand. Don't you worry Jaken-San; the court will find a reason that will convince the Lord. It is tradition that a Lord produces an heir within a Century of his reign-"_

"_- Sesshomaru has been given the title for more than a century but he left the spot vacant anyway."_

"_That is why! We are unable to decide if he has broken the tradition or if he is still within the century grace period of the reign. And, since nobody has ever broken the rule, there is no written consequence…"_

I snigger. I have heard this discussion countless times amongst worried courtiers as I pace through the hallways. This issue has always been radiating from the walls of the citadel anyway. I have heard of the tradition since I had been given tutoring on court etiquette in my youth.

Traditions, what are they apart from mere rules to keep the western lands alive? If I have found a way to continue sustaining the western lands without having to follow the tradition, I see no sense in following the rule.

Am I a coward to love somebody? If my disposition allowed me to, I wish I could start yowling in laughter and point a finger at the court official. You don't understand me court official, no one does. Pah, now I sound like and angst-ridden adolescence. I do not fear to love. I fear what I loose in love. It is a weakness that destroys; perhaps, the only thing that can dampen arrogance, perhaps. I do not wish to ponder upon such an issue because honestly, there are other more important things to tend to such as the assassins.

How fitting, all these thoughts coming from a creature born of a marriage to save the western lands. I truly salute my dead father for finding the courage to mate with a stranger and then consort with a vile human Izayoi. Haha-ue came from lands towards the North and their marriage was to end a century long feud as well as to seek aid in the war against the panther tribes. Of course, I was born in the midst the whole affair. Frankly, I have nothing to say about my origins nor do I have any feelings towards the whole rationale for my birth. Your life is yours, if you insist on blaming your miserable existence on others, so be it. For me, my life started with no commitments. I do as I like with no attachments involved. It is a plain and simple logic; logic, which involves little thinking. I have chosen to live only for myself since I only receive one choice. Living in my logic means, you will have no time to love. Only enough time to improve. This is the rat-race which we call life.

Assassins, I shall flush you out of my territory and crush every bone in your body until I hear you scream. I would love to hear you scream.

**

* * *

**

**Rin's POV**

The afternoon waned; long and hot just like a dying candle combusting the remainder of oxygen. The sun was in a distant but uncomfortable location on the horizon: right in front of the performance circle where the Shitatsupa trained. The few Shitatsupa who still had the will to fight sparred amongst each other. The rest ambled in circles muttering excuses and predicting their fates. Rin was one of the lost few. Even the ex-Shitatsupa watched the wretchedness of the scene with little words of encouragement. Today's afternoon sun was blazing hotter than before and it had an effect on the Shitatsupa. Murmurs of how Yuragu would have to strain himself to flog the entire batch of rookie trainers were scattered in subtlety. Ishigiro sat amongst his peers in a clustered mass, a scowl riding high on his face as he eyed Rin.

Rin made no attempt to practice and she stood silently in a corner of the rink. She swore she heard Musashi's hollers rise above the heat and into her ears. It pained her intensely. The heat, it burned! Needles….

Unknowingly, Rin buckled over and collapsed to her knees. She clutched her elbow and her ebony hair trailed down her back and over her shoulders, moistened with sweat. White spittle collected at the corners of Rin's mouth and she spat it out disdainfully. Rin gasped and wheezed as if she was being smothered by thick layers of silk. Her hands flailed in all directions and tore at her face, desperate to get the heat which was radiated from the ground off her face. She tore! Sweat droplets poured from the roots of her hair and she struggled to keep her face free. Tears collected at the corner of her eyes for an unknown reason and she did not attempt to wipe them off.

The heat…

The Shitatsupa around her paid minimal or no attention, limiting them to cold and harsh stares. A rule of Ageru: every assassin for himself.

The last thing Rin did was to stand up, only to save her falling pride. She remained there until the beginning of Ageru.

* * *

Bwahahah people! I have just decided to be mean and postpone Ageru yet again to the next chapter XD (Runs in fear of readers).

I'm sorry guys but I'm not in the best of moods for writing this whole week so I just decided to release this chapter first. Review and tell me what you think ok?

Aah, I realized that I haven't been writing the disclaimer (gomenasai!), Although I don't know what its for… haiz

BTW, this is a happy message to Inuyasha and Kagome lovers. The next chapter will be an Inuyasha/Kagome special (besides the beginning about Ageru) so you guys can look forward to that. I promise D.

Hey, have you clever readers out there ever heard of the downfall of the China aristocracy? Hehe, the western lands will be an example D

Jaa!


	7. To What Extent Part I

Heyya! I'm terribly sorry for not updating in a really long time. My letter of apology is at the end of the chapter (this chapter is special because it's divided into two parts, the apology is after the second part) and the second part is an Inuyasha special aaand, this is the chapter about the long anticipated (and frequently postponed until now ) AGERU!!! yaaay. Ok ! enjoy and review

To What Extent Some Go... Part I

The rule of Ageru: destroy all targets and obstructions. Many Shitatsupa failed to understand this rule completely and nobody has explained anything further beyond that line. Thus, many of the Shitatsupa came up with our own concept. Doesn't killing require strategy? Where is the strategy in Ageru?

---

Rin's gaze lingered on the shadowy form of Yazu who propped himself against the same tree where their feud had occurred only minutes ago. Although the sun was behind him, she swore she had caught the line of a sleek grin plastered to his narcissistic face. As if to acknowledge Rin's gaze, Yazu, tapped the band of his Hakama. Rin whirled her head in disgust and resentment; sparing her the embarrassment but earning her a crick in the neck which added to her nausea. She clutched her Naginata and rubbed her back with her spare hand. She needed to be strong in order to face the knotted and bristled surface of the twine used to flog the Shitatsupa.

Strength: Rin knew that she lacked physical strength as compared to her other team members. Musashi and Endan both had the physical build meant for brute power. They were capable of what seemed like impossible human feats. Kira, a fellow female Naginata bearer had a flawless body toned with ideal curvatures. When Rin was younger, she had observed Kira with awe. Kira's muscles rippled under the weight of the Naginata and when she thrust the Naginata forward to spear the false target, her back would arch gracefully to increase the attack power and strength. Kira was born to wield the Naginata, Rin mused. Kira, however had all but one flaw: she patronized all male inhabitants of the village. Rin knew this too well. Kira, a fellow female Naginata bearer had a flawless body toned with ideal curvatures. Kira's muscles rippled under the weight of the man and when she thrust herself forward, her back would arch gracefully to increase the attack power and strength. Rin found an uncanny resemblance of a Naginata to a lover. That was probably why the Naginata was associated with the female, she mused yet again.

She stared at the hilt of her Naginata and she eased her grip.

Being the only Naginata bearer who was a Shitatsupa, Rin was the only one who held such a large short-range weapon. She scowled when she realized the suggestiveness of the Naginata techniques she would demonstrate.

She merely forced the fact that she would be flogged today back into her mind. Yazu probably meant what he said.

"Call me then!" Rin hollered hoarsely to the figure in the shadows that had hidden himself as easy as a moth on the course bark of a tree. Yazu's hand was probably courser then a tree's bark.

"You'd regret what you have just said Rin-Chan!" came a twisted reply. Before Rin's retort left her mouth, Yuragu called for all Shitatsupa to line up.

"Who are you?" Yuragu cried, invoking the ancient protocol.

"Shitatsupa!" They roared. Rin's skin prickled with goose bumps as the sonorous cries echoed and bounced through the walls of the village and came back in vibrating compressions. The ground shook under the Shitatsupa's feet as they declared their loyalty.

Basic instructions were given for the Shitatsupa to gather in their teams. Rin stood in solitude. This year she did not have Kira to stand behind in the shadows. Was she jealous of Kira for being so sociable? Rin honestly had no clue; she never yearned for popularity although she was given an exceptional level of respect due to Yuragu's constant watch over her.

Rin's headache was relatively better compared to the beginning of the day. However, as she drew nearer to her fate, Rin allowed herself to be wearied by the impending flogging; although she was indifferent to hurt, the anxiety of anticipating the abuse as well as the mental stress was challenging even for Rin to suppress. It was in times like these when Rin pondered about her Lord. She had always associated Sesshomaru to pain and it was probably because he was the one who had introduced her to an entirely new spectrum of faith. Rin followed no religion. She sneered; no religion would take her anyway. After her years of assessing her life, she had acquired a belief, pain is life and happiness is only the beginning of another circle of misfortune. She believed in the Shinigami. In fact, Rin was sure the Kami's had assigned her many of their pallbearers to make sure she did not defy death yet again.

A set of straw figures with bamboo in the cores to replicate real bone and muscle were placed in the center of the rink.

---

The first round of observation was meant for the Shitatsupa who were trained in ranged weapons. Five of them surrounded the figurines. I could see that two were trained in the Shuriken from their outfits: a secretive Gi with extended and exaggerated sleeves to confuse opponents as to where the shuriken would be thrown from. Fancy and good for deception, yet, the prissy garb had its drawbacks. I had witnessed, too many times, inconsistent and inexperienced shuriken wielders who had caught their Poison Shuriken in their fancy sleeves. If they were lucky, the thick layers protected their skin form the poisoned Shuriken tips. However, with the perfection of the technology produced in this village, our dangerous arsenal of Shuriken which came in the series could kill when it grazed the skin. The poison is so advanced and potent that even our antidotes had no effect. The lucky ones die a night later.

The rest of the Shitatsupa who were from Ranged Weapon teams was a tall, lean and tanned Wolf Dai-Youkai that used the Short-range and was rumored to be a vagabond prince as well as two Kusarigama wielders who reminded me of a face I had seen so long ago.

"Hajime!"

Immediately, the Shuriken wielders who seemed unaffected by the heat whipped out their Shuriken as I had anticipated. In a pained flash of steel, a dull thud resonated followed by a shriek of pain. I saw only one Shuriken embedded into the section of the straw representing the head. I saw only one unfortunate Shuriken wielder clutching his right arm in a blood-soaked arm guard. As he lay under the heat, no body except for death approached him. I watched silently, showing no signs of feeling disturbed. It was an unnerving scene to observe as he lay writhing on the ground. I found it difficult to even peal my eyes away from him and my neck was locked. I was watching him die slowly and without a doubt, allowing my eyes to gorge on the gore with fascination. The poison had an immediate effect and soon he would experience a seizure. Foam collected from the contorted edges of his lips which twitched disgustingly and the unfortunate Shitatsupa lay in a pool of blood and sweat. He must have cut himself deeply for so much blood to spurt. Since the poison of the Poison-Shuriken was so effective, it had no real need to slice. His lips were turning purple and his back curled grotesquely.

A shriek erupted from the crowd of ex-Shitatsupa and the majority of the crowd's attention was shifted to a bawling female Youkai in the crowds. I sneered at the evitable. I do not love for the mere reason that all things you love will come to an end. Why should you burden yourself with the knowledge that one you may treasure will be gone someday? It is safer to either be indifferent or loathe.

The Wolf Youkai, as if disgusted by the dying Shitatsupa paused from his long assault on the straw figures which sported an accurate line of arrows and turned his stance to the fallen comrade. With an audible sneer, he aimed, and shot. The arrow that was lodged into the depths of the near-dead Shuriken wielder's throat bobbed grotesquely with his last breaths and his moans ceased. I had nothing to say and I doubt anyone else who observed the drama wanted to say anything either. I turned my head to the elder assassins who were in avid discussion. The Shuriken team which was the largest in number compared to us remained still and motionless and silently grieved another death. Mortality rate was high in that team so it was natural. Nevertheless, each assassin here has been acquainted to death at some point.

After the ranged-weapon's Shitatsupa were done with their targets, the five figures were "headless" and two were detached in the center from the Kusarigama. Shuriken were embedded into the replicated limbs and there was a clean line of arrows on the supposed chests: Nothing less from the ranged weapons Shitatsupa who were miraculously out of the heat.

The next category of Shitatsupa to be observed was inevitably the short-range weapons. The ten of us had to attack the dummies displayed with any five random techniques which were taught to us: Simple? Perhaps simple was an understatement. It is difficult for ten heavily armed Shitatsupa to approach a dummy without a decent squabble amongst who gets which dummy. Thus Ageru for the short-range weapon holders was also individual miniature-fights. There was also the generic rush to attempt to sever the dummy made of fire rat pelts which was used only with the short-range weapons.

The Shitatsupa are an immature and non-insightful lot. They lack the "touch" which is prominent amongst older or perhaps, more experienced assassins who hold great levels of control and power. The Shitatsupa are comparable to common dogs: blindly accepting truth, bulldozing into trouble as well as into one another's futon: Disgusting. Our round of Ageru would take perhaps a half-hour. It depended on the judgment of the ex-Shitatsupa.

My back was ticklish under a strange burning sensation. This feeling shows itself when I am nervous and uneasy. I slapped my back and the sensation retorted and continued: this time in my right palm. Never before had I experienced such a situation (usually because I leave the pain alone). However, the last time I had felt as such was when I was captured by Naraku and lay in his hands, waiting, waiting, waiting… waiting for Sesshomaru to come which was years ago. Now as I ponder upon this, I probably feel so because I am anticipating an immense physical hurt. Pah, flogging, I've been hit once by a bamboo in my childhood. Wait- I did not feel such a burning sensation then. Now that I have revived such an insignificant thought, the theory that I feel the burn before I anticipate immense pain does not stand.

What am I doing thinking of such things before Ageru?! I snapped my thought-wearied mind back to Ageru.

"Hajime!"

I progressed slowly around the mass of nine people who charged directly to the fire rat dummy, as expected. I felt a long sway in the crowd of ex-Shitatsupa who had gathered. They probably felt bored at the age old custom. My grip on the hilt of my Naginata had been affected as a sudden prickling erupted from my palm. As much as I admit to be indifferent to the physical touch (apart from sexual advances), I must confess, I am ticklish. But, I AM immune to other physical hurt that many people are unable to bear. That makes me different.

I had seen a flailing opportunity, but an opportunity nonetheless to spear a dummy through a thin gap made form the mass of brainless Shitatsupa. Once in the ancient past, a foolish Shitatsupa stood away from the attacking crowd as he saw little hope in managing to even tackle one dummy with the coagulated mass of Youki, sweat and stench. Of course, he was flogged, flogged to death. He had insulted the ancient characteristic of an assassin: never stand aside in a feud. Despite my sadism, I value my life.

My minute opportunity however, was shattered when my Naginata was deflected off the blade lock of a kendo stick and a katana blade: two imprudent Shitatsupa who had chosen to waste their time sparring then to hit the dummies. I was enraged at my loss of opportunity. Although I rarely showed my rage, the spirit which had been adopted by the Shitatsupa about to go for Ageru which had also entered me made it an obligation to get angry and furious. Further more, I wished to waste no time with attempting to scratch the dummies to avoid flogging to the death. After I marred this dummy, I would sit down and wait for Yazu to call my name.

As if to fuel my frustration, my headache boiled again, returning to me with triple the wrath. The sweat, the cries, the swords…

"TYPICAL!" I shrieked at the loss of an opportunity, although I knew I would regret such a display of emotion later. I parried the blade lock of the kendo and the katana with an intense fury. I had probably upset and startled the two duelists but I took no time to observe their facial expressions. I pushed away from the attacking crowd and lunged at the target. It was a small opportunity. Focusing, I saw nothing but the square inch on the dummy. Sesshomaru-sama unexpectedly appeared in my vision. I was shocked, if not enraged at the appearance. I could not comprehend, for all the knowledge I hold why he of all people would appear. I lunged forward; harder, drawing my stance from the ground, the prickly sensation arising once more.

Lunge.

There was an ominous rip and before me, the dummy was clearly shred in two. A pain-ridden yowl filled my ears next and I turned to my right to see the Katana wielder gripping a bloodied arm. His blood pooled near his feet and my Naginata appeared as if it was dipped into red ink used to write death sentences. In reality, it was drenched in a substance, that when one lacked, would die.

---

An hour later

I leaned against a decayed tree trunk, mingling with the nostalgic smell of the common ivy and the moist smell of wood which contradicts the harsh weather. The smell which lingered around my nose reminded me of my years as a child, blindly following Sesshomaru without a doubt and waiting… waiting for him amongst the low shrubbery with Jaken; sleeping under the vast sky whilst waiting for his return. Very recently, I have found myself thinking of Sesshomaru frequently before I face trials. It is probably because, no matter how hard I try to forget, a deep stain which remains on my tainted soul binds me to the fact that he was always my protector and benefactor; although now, I urge myself to forget that fact because now, I am assassin. Better then human and equal to Youkai. I need no protector.

I am remaining for my "punishment". Yes, it is an unfair flogging for I know I have done no wrong other than to refuse Yazu's futon but, this flogging will announce my strength to Yazu and the village of assassins. I will make it known that I am no mere human. I am better than a human. My mental strength is beyond normal and I will demonstrate this by accepting the flogging calmly. When the strikes come, I will not scream like unofficial history demands. I will also be proving Yazu on how insipidly witless he is by turning this flogging got my advantage. I would probably gain more respect and recognition from other teams. Then, those males living on high hormonal drives would stop harassing me.

It seems as if I am on a journey for perfection. But I say that perfection is a virtual object. It can be seen but cannot be touched, thus the term virtual. Perfection is unreal. What I would call myself, a person dissatisfied with her present power. I am on a journey for greater power and upgrading. There is no term for it but it can be simply stated as, I want to outdo the greatest power in existence. Perhaps, my goal can also be translated as: I want to destroy Sesshomaru.

To my left, a group surrounded the Neko-Youkai whose left arm I had just severed. I recognized him as one who had a reputable temper, limited wit and the ability to hold ancient grudges. He shot me a look of pained fury. I smiled inwardly, it was the face of a beaten coward.

I feel no remorse about hacking off his left arm. It was his fault for standing in my path. I will do so to all those who obstruct me.

"Rin"

I had been absorbed in my thoughts that I had shut all input from my ears and missed all the cries of flogged Shitatsupa. Nobody usually stayed to watch the punishment so the quadrangle was relatively empty apart from morbid onlookers and the group sympathizing over the Neko-Youkai's missing arm.

I don't know. I was fazed by the heat and Yuragu's shadow. His left hand gripped my arm. From his tensed palm, it seemed that he was gripping me like a vice. Contrary to that, his hand was, was it, trembling? No, it was more like quivering. As if, he was reluctant to whip me. His steps, I could sense were hesitant as well. His right palm stank of the musky smell of ancient leather. Bits of disintegrated pig skin from the handle of the whip traced his blistered hand. That was the deal for agreeing to be the representative of the assassins. I reached over and touched his hand. He glanced at me, and hesitated. My facial reaction remained stoic but I tipped my chin slightly. Yuragu quickly turned away. I noted his hesitancy and panic which was odd for his personality (A/N I'm sorry, I know I haven't elaborated on Yuragu's Character but I will later. Gimme feedback ok?). I noted only the Shitatsupa who had already been whipped. They were sprawled on the floor in a degrading position. Some were in obvious pain as their faces were contorted and their eyebrows were tightly knotted. None of them were moaning though. I also noted that I was the last of those to be flogged. Amongst the five victims of the humiliating Shitatsupa, I sighted the Youkai who had put the careless Shuriken wielder to peace. He sat with his back stiff. I admired how he managed to keep his face straight unlike the others. He caught my sideward glance and momentarily held my gaze however, he turned his head slightly to observe the shadows cast by tearing female figure whom I recognized as the female companion of the dead Shuriken wielder.

When I reached the stand for the flogging, no significant feeling was present in my mind. I would not describe it as focusing; perhaps I was attempting to distract myself from something. I allowed myself to kneel into a lowly position to receive the 5 blows. One needs to shed his dignity in order to gain more. Perhaps I can explain it with one needing less weight in order to be catapulted higher.

My outer protective vest was removed and the only piece of cloth which would conceal me from the Yazu's eyes was a thin and white woven textile which tightly bound around my chest. I stole a glance and spotted my team members. Their faces were grave except for Kira who had a look of pained restriction, as if trying to conceal another facial expression. To me, she looked extremely pretentious. She had probably heard from Yazu about what was going to happen. Kira has never been an ally of mine probably because of the difference of our personalities. Musashi had tried to bargain my way out of the flogging blaming the heat and how women were usually spared from flogging. I smirked when I saw him pleading with Yuragu who also seemed shocked at me being chosen. Yuragu had no power to decide who would be spared the whip. Musashi knew me very little. I would never allow insignificant factors such as the heat to affect my performance and I am both physically and mentally equal to Youkai. Youkai are better then Man who are better than women, Thus, I may be flogged.

Yazu stood alone under the same tree I sat under earlier. My eyes did allow me to view his face but him being a Youkai, he probably was able to read my expression very clearly from where he was.

I could feel the heat radiated by Yuragu and his Youki made an insignificant increase as he held the whip in his right hand. The air had an eerie quietness. The silence mad a buzzing sound within my ears. I had never been flogged before… this is my first experience. It should be special right? I laughed inwardly. I did not feel fear, but a strange ecstasy. Was it unnatural to feel as such? Probably not because I was ecstatic anticipating the rewards after the flogging.

"_Shitatsupa tsukuru o"_

Yuragu murmured. That was what he said before he raised his right arm to whip. Suddenly, a deep feeling of panic arose and I mentally jumped to suppress it. As much as I try to keep my emotions as legendary as such, I will never be able to completely eliminate the fact that I am still fifteen. A young near-women with a personality of a young girl barricaded by a looming wall of defense which signified an older, more mature and sadistic personality erected by her unusual life as an assassin. I had no time to enjoy normal fifteen year old thoughts of fear and ecstasy. I needed to become an assassin quickly and fear no punishment or judgment.

White, livid, searing pain echoed through my body the moment the whip made contact with my back. It felt as if the whip's impact knocked through my bones and my ribs felt like breaking! Breaking! The shock and pain rose from my ribs towards my lungs and pushed upwards towards my throat!

My face contorted and the lids of my eyes squeezed shut. I did not scream though. I had managed to contain the pain although I admit that the level of pain was beyond my expectations. I could feel a liquid run down my back. It was probably my blood.

I could hear Yuragu panting but I had no idea why. My head felt light and dizzy and I felt as if was drifting away from my main body.

"_Shitatsupa! tsukuru o"_

I heard him say again. I also felt the whip touch my back. Touch! I felt no pain this time. I was staring at the straw I was kneeling on but suddenly my vision was filled with the hallucination of thick knots which I recognized as that which made the whip. I knew that I was not looking at the whip as it was whipping me as it was physically impossible but I felt mind's eye traveling up the rope! Higher! Faster! I urged myself out of morbid curiosity. I could no longer feel the pain that earlier was rocketing through my body but I was focused on reaching the end of my whip: destined to the hand of Yuragu that was whipping me. In this state, I felt no sense of right or wrong. No- I nothing is absolutely right or wrong. I felt no morals in my head. I felt… what was it; free and unrestrained.

"_Shitatsupa… t-sukuru… o!"_

Again! I heard his voice. But! My vision was already coursing high above his arm. My vision was that I was traveling up Yuragu's toned right arm. I was coursing up high and fast until, my vision reached his back and it stopped. I was neither afraid nor curious. All I felt was the need to mar his back as well. I was aware that my body was still kneeling and I was currently receiving my third whip which I hardly felt however, I was feeling and seeing something entirely different. I now was viewing Yuragu whipping me form behind Yuragu himself! I felt no sense of queerness, shock or disbelief. With my morals missing, I merely felt amusement.

I was driven.

Driven.

I rammed forward in my virtual self and into Yuragu's back. For a second, nothing was apparent and I was caught on a thin and precarious silence.

"Urgh!"

Yuragu's gulp and a dull thump pulled my virtual existence back into my real body and now, feelings of disbelief returned to me. It felt like a dream where one could do morally impossible things and yet feel that it was right. What was I to talk about morals?

I twisted my back to support myself lying down on the floor. I stared. To my right, Yuragu crouched, tightly gripping his right arm which was stained with blood. Whose blood? He turned his head to me…

I was locked in his aquamarine eyes. The look drew me in and I was captivated. He was not glaring nor was he just glancing. I recognized the look; it was that of deep and ultimate pain.

Pain!

Something was deeply wrong. Why was I feeling no pain? There was blood trickling down my back, yes… but no pain.

"uurh… Ri-"

Yuragu's words were slurred and from a crouched position, he fell to the ground. His back was towards me and under his long black hair, I saw….

A riddle of slashes and new blood clots were streaked violently across his back. I saw nothing but his blood and sweat droplets as well as the pained vibrating of his back muscles and rough breathing. I felt as if I was slipping into a familiar darkness like a blade smoothly slipping into the darkness of its saya… it was not the darkness I felt when I died before. I had fainted.

Haha ok! That's part one. Part two is the Inuyasha special yays to Inuyasha fans haha, see you there


	8. To What Extent Part II

Part II

"Damn it Kagome! This place hasn't changed one darn bit!"

"Inuyasha! Mind your language in front of Daiki, please!"

The forest thrummed with the bustle of life as it welcomed the long awaited return of two accustomed guests and their young son. A figure sporting an age-old robe of fire-rat pelts and a tatty baseball cap used to conceal two noticeable ears strode to the center of the clearing and stood.

"You are right, Inuyasha."

A reasonably young woman with dark hair followed behind him, piggy-backing a spirited toddler.

Kagome inhaled the air that surrounded her and she was filled with the deep and unforgotten memories of the Sengoku Jidai. It was considerably fresher and the scent that wafted through the air carried traces of herbs and wild flowers. A bottomless feeling of nostalgia shot through her body in aching pangs and she heaved a great and contented sigh.

Inuyasha seemed to be caught in the mood too and for a moment, the two people stood in silence and went through reminiscence of their earlier adventures of epic proportions: nearly getting them killed only to be saved by the other and learning about their feelings for each other. The only sounds created by the visitors were the deep and thoughtful breaths of Kagome and Inuyasha and the faint rustling of their son Daiki playing with Kagome's hair.

This was the first time since Kagome had become pregnant with Daiki that both she and Inuyasha had been to the Sengoku Jidai. After Naraku had been defeated five years ago, the five companions agreed that their days of traveling were over although the deeply etched friendship would go on forever. Miroku, Sango and Shippo settled in village near the well, a month after which Miroku and Sango held a real marriage ceremony. Inuyasha and Kagome had remained in Kaede's village, going back to Tokyo occasionally until Kagome found out that she was pregnant and both of them made a decision to stay in the modern time until Kagome had delivered Daiki and he had grown a year old.

"Come Daiki…"

Kagome muttered and placed Daiki on the grass. The toddler whined to express his discomfort and reluctance. Kagome chuckled and crept forward to encourage her son to walk. As she observed his actions, she could see that Daiki had inherited Inuyasha's character. Daiki was no doubt stubborn like his father when he refused to move for a moment but sat there and whined. This was typically Daiki and Inuyasha.

"Daiki! Come here!"

Inuyasha squatted in front of Kagome and held his arms out. Daiki's eyes lit up with an omniscient gloss and his golden eyes radiated the innocence and simplicity his young mind thought the world was. He stumbled forward with unstable but sure steps and frowned, displaying a comical version of determination. Kagome looked at young Daiki. His hair was white, wavy and messy but neither Inuyasha nor Kagome attempted to do anything to it. The style suited Daiki. Daiki did not have the doggy ears situated on the top of his head but he had the ears of a human. Probably the only thing that hinted that he had traces of Youkai blood in him were only his hair, his piercing golden eyes and the fact that Kagome had to cut his nails more than once a day…

When Daiki had reached his father, Inuyasha hauled him over and started tickling him relentlessly. Daiki's squeals of laughter echoed through the forest in high-pitched shrills. Kagome sat away from the father and son to observe them. Inuyasha and Daiki were so alike…

It was as if this naïve and playful character accompanied by an immeasurable level of loyalty, determination and pluck ran through the family. Kagome had been told of Inuyasha's father from Inuyasha and Myoga and knew that he was just as loyal and spontaneous as Inuyasha and perhaps Daiki. Inuyasha carried an inevitably tired Daiki who tucked in the crook of Inuyasha's arm droopy-eyed. Inuyasha placed Daiki gently beside Kagome and then sprawled out next to him.

"It really hasn't changed one damn bit!"

Kagome hesitated a glance to and turned back when she saw that Daiki was sleeping. For a moment, Kagome and Inuyasha lay on the grass in silence; Daiki's regular breathing and the soft rises and falls of his chest pronounced the peace and ease of the moment. Over time, Inuyasha's brash character had worn off and he was significantly gentler and he displayed his feelings more openly. He had also grown accustomed to the smells and sounds of the modern world.

"Let's visit Miroku and Sango…" Kagome mused.

"In a while Kagome… I want to enjoy the quiet for a little while and remember our time here… just a little while more."

Kagome smiled and reached over to hold Inuyasha's hand. He no longer flinched at the physical touch but now relaxed under her palm.

"Daiki is so much like you and something tells me you were like this when you were younger…" Kagome started, looking at Daiki's flushed face and then to Inuyasha's.

Inuyasha turned his head towards her; a dreamy expression was present on his face.

"… But how did you manage acquire such a profound vocabulary." Kagome clucked in disapproval. Inuyasha chuckled.

"I didn't have a mother long enough to "sit" me whenever I said something wrong so…"

"Inuyasha…" Kagome started-

"W-what?" His dreamy expression turned into that of panic.

"-You are so adorable!" Kagome finished and chuckled at the Hanyou's mystified expression.

"I think it runs in your family. All of you have an incurable air of naive ness!" Kagome laughed.

Inuyasha seemed to be in deep thought for a moment. His head was propped upon his right arm and his ears twitched randomly.

"For once Kagome, I can prove you wrong." Inuyasha gave a snort and Kagome turned her head.

"You forgot our dear old Sesshomaru-sama."

Kagome nodded and looked to the sky. It was a deeper shade of blue as compared to that in modern Tokyo.

"I can smell him skulking around, Kagome." She perked her head and the wide and glossy eyes of Inuyasha confronted her vision.

"He's close but I don't think he wants to see us." Inuyasha yawned and got up to scratch his back lazily.

"By the way, his human girl isn't with him nor does his scent hint of her…"

---

Ok guys! That's about it for the Inuyasha special. Ok, I'm sorry that its remarkably short but fear not Inuyasha fans who were anticipating-a-longer-story. The Inu gang will return to the scene soon enough How can I forget our little-doggy-eared boy huh?

I apologize deeply (really, I am very sorry) for not updating very much sooner. I was being really lazy and had a really bad author's block. I hope it doesn't show in the story.

Ok, to make it up to everyone, you guys can give suggestions as to when and how Rin meets our dear old Sesshomaru-sama and if it's good (or perhaps fan-girl or high-story-potential) enough, I might include it. Anyway, I've been short on ideas.

I'm so weird, I think of a great beginning and a great ending but I have no way to patch up the whole thing as I go along. So sorry you guys ! Forgive me??

Oh yes, Thank you so much to all my reviewers.

And I apologize to FluffyRinLover for not following her story line, I couldn't bring myself to turn on the Com this past few weeks (gosh, I'm such a miserable wretch who feels guilty all over) and I promise I will review as soon as possible.

By the way, if you like the story, please tell me by reviewing or putting it on story alert ok? Thanks so much to all those who have been following the story closely. I love you guys loads!!! 33

Bye! I will update soon because I plan to write a whole lot of interesting things "ahem" smiles.

P.S, Don't you think people create a different personality for themselves in order to adapt to their situation? If they are taken out of that situation and into a more favorable one, don't you think their genuine personality will show?

Well, I kinda added a bit of my strange personality into the story so that's probably why I think Rin is so cool.

Bye!!!

ShinjiteruHikari 333


	9. False Memories

Fake memories

Back again!

Ah, the right of my back hurts. It's probably because of my scoliosis. Oh well.

NEVER mind! If I only get ONE or TWO reviewers, so be it! I will continue the story for their sakes! I thank everyone for all the nice reviews! I thank thee!

---

My back…the pain was pulsating in aching waves and triggered a nauseating aura around me…

I remembered…

Water.

A lot of water.

"Jaken-sama! Don't miss this one!" The green toad Youkai stumbled as he waded in water up to his waist. I chuckled, stepping into the shallow stream that reached to slightly below my knees. Watching Jaken-sama fish was the only other form of amusement for me other than picking Hamanasu or simply watching Sesshomaru-sama if he was present. His face; could be likened the moon! I remember waking up one night to see him propped against a tree, accessing the night sky. As if Kami willed this moment to be: The moon was against his face and he gave a luminous glow! He was pale, yes, but not sickly.

Definitely not sickly.

Just like the moon, he gave out a shine, as if he was one born to command all your attention… Just like the moon, he had an aura of mystery and that of grace. I had heard from Jaken-sama that Sesshomaru-sama was an aristocrat amongst the highest of standards amongst the youkai and it was not hard for me to believe him. His hair fell in smooth locks over his shoulder and at that moment, he had turned his chin towards the moon I had been likening him to. Her rays graced his face and added to his air of grace, intrigue and poise. Also like the moon, he had an unpredictable nature. An undependable nature of which you should never fully rely on however, allow yourself a simple belief that if he cared for you, he would certainly protect you. Trusting Sesshomaru-sama was like trusting the moon to return to its same position monthly.

I remember thinking, Kami allowed us pleasures in life (mine simply being able to observe the beauty of my lord) but he gave them to us at a price. I would surely pay to witness such a phenomena…

And I did. Sesshomaru-sama left us the next morning and did not return until a week later.

"Haha! Caught one!"

In his three fingers lodged a relatively large, squirming fish.

"Jaken-sama Segoi!" I complimented him and he acknowledged it with a wide grin, nodding his bony chin encrusted with the mud that ran along the banks of the stream. Catching fish with three fingers was an effort to be commended (A/N Really! I can't catch any fish even with 5 fingers…).

I strode forward to observe the catch at a closer range.

Then, I could not closely recall what had happened but only that I took a step forward and Jaken's grip on the fish loosened. It shot out of his hands at a remarkable speed and startled me. I was young then so I was also prone to blunders. My right foot was lodged into a hole in the rocks. My foot was caught in an awkward angle so no matter where I twisted, my ankle remained caught and the jagged rock cut deeply into the skin of my ankle.

I yelped in pain; fell backwards and to my misfortune, my head made contact with sincerely friendly boulder of course nature. It was large, wet, and rough. I was able to see and hear but the rest of my senses were fazed and numbed. I felt a cold liquid slide through the roots of my hair and down my forehead. Some trickled into my mouth and it tasted nauseatingly salty. The water from the cold stream doused my Yukata and although the sordid stains were washed off, it made my skin tingle from the cold.

I remember sitting there and crying and Jaken-sama's large and vulgar gawking.

Just before I had come to any bitter conclusions on how callous and inconsiderate the world was and how much Kami hated me to award me with such pain, a sleek hand slid around my cheek and then under my arm to pull me up. My foot miraculously slipped out of the "tight" hole and the swollen and throbbing ankle was pulled out of the water. My vision was failing and I looked up into the one who pulled me out.

"Domo… A-a-riga-tou…. Se-Sho…maru-sam…aa" I whispered.

He placed me on the bank and rubbed my temples slowly to ease the pain in my head, which he somehow knew of. After that, I blacked out.

---

Moonlight- The first thing that greeted me filtered through thin slats on the wall and onto my face. Without thought I slowly sat up. The second thing to great me was the stiffness and soreness that shot through my back and legs.

My back- it merely felt stiff but there was no pain from lacerations…

I remembered the morbid lacerations that laced Yuragu's back fancifully like the designs on silk.

My mind began to wonder what had become of him…

Instinctively, I raised my right arm and felt along my lower back hesitatively; wondering what I would be touching. The base of my back felt smooth and there were no bumps or scars. Of course, being a human, scars would not heal so quickly.

After a checking on my arms and haltingly arriving on the faint conclusion that I was unharmed, I attempted standing. I had managed to stand, but not for long. Gravity claimed me and I was ruthlessly pulled back to a thin futon covering the floor.

At my collapse, I sensed a sudden increase of Youki surrounding the hut and my pitiful human ears allowed me to pick out faint murmurs and the sharp gushes of the assassins making quick gestures. There was a final increase and the slat doors on my right opened slowly.

I was facing the left so I observed the silhouettes. A stocky shadow meant Endan… the other had a hunched posture.

"Rin." The voice! It reminded me of thunder and the smooth feel of velvet… The shadow of the slightly hunched figure quivered so I could guess, it was Yuragu who was in the hut as well.

I sat up and adopted an air of caution, making my face as emotionless as possible although I was deeply concerned as to how he was as well as the fact that my life (as if my life is worth anything or significant enough to be called a life) was being threatened.

Yuragu sat s foot opposite me while Endan settled himself against the door with an expression unfamiliar to me plastered on his face. Yuragu wore only a pair of white hakamas but his chest and back were heavily bandaged. Not only did he sit awkwardly but, as much as the rosewood scented ointment and tonics smelled sweet, they awkwardly masqueraded the thick and heavy scent of old blood and pus. It was true; the lacerations were indeed passed to him. I stiffened considerably and the atmosphere turned into an annoying awkwardness. Perhaps…

"Yuragu… I apologize." I intended to mumble but the words came out clear.

"Rin." He only said my name! I clenched my fist; holding on to the thin threads that made the futon. They would surely disintegrate under my grip.

"All you say is my name…?" I started, a sudden spark erupted from within me and I was not compelled to hold it back.

"I have indeed scarred you… So will we quickly discuss how I have done so…? So that I am able to at least get over the-" I coughed

"-don't say guilt, Rin." As fast as it was created, the rage died like a small fire smothered by a wet cloth. I stared at Yuragu well aware that I was making no attempt to hide a rude gawk.

"Rin, I know you better than that. You certainly don't feel guilt for trying to PROTECT yourself against the whip. I know what you were attempting to do."

"You are calling me a coward for pretending to be sorry?" I smirked, running a finger through my tangled hair.

"I DON'T want to be pitied Yuragu, I am not apologetic about wounding you. When I was in my other self, I felt like murdering you by impaling you with my own hands for whipping me!" I breathed roughly as the words spewed from my mouth. With a sudden childish reaction, my right hand felt like flying to cover my mouth but I stifled the action.

Think before you spout.

"I did not come here to be destroyed or mutilated by your capabilities AGAIN, Rin." 

"Then hurry! Explain to me! What have I done!?" I cried.

Yuragu snorted.

"You will hear what capacities you have."

Endan shifted at the door and sniffed uneasily.

"Next spring will be your turn to carry out The Ordeal… by then I will upgrade you to be higher than the rest. Are you interested in that?"

**Rin's POV**

A pulse.

Sesshomaru sat up suddenly. The air tasted salty with the faint smell of incense lingering. He rubbed his nose and allowed himself a jaw-popping yawn. He was in his chambers so there was nothing to lose.

He turned his head slowly to the window on the eastern wall of his chambers and cocked an eyebrow. Even whilst in a somewhat half-sleep mode, he had sensed an unusual increase of energy towards the forests towards the east.

Although the energy was small and pulsating, amplified with every pulse, he acknowledged it. Though it was considerably far from where he was, he was still curious as to how such a queer form of energy would exist. He had smelt neither Youki nor any spiritual incense.

He turned around to stretch his back luxuriously. The muscles in his back rippled under the tension.

He snarled when a sudden urge hit him to investigate. As much as he craved roaming free once again amongst the rolling wilderness, traveling with a goal of self-improvement, he had made the choice of returning his father's fortress-

No- His fortress,

He was now tied down to running the court of the western lands. Although he was given the privilege of having a Taisho to carry out all administrative work and heading hearings, thus making Sesshomaru a mere figure head of the western lands, Sesshomaru still had heavier burdens as compared to anyone else. To the court, Sesshomaru aided them no more than representing the western lands, annihilating the pressing Shogunate and to carry on the blood.

The blood… Sesshomaru unwittingly shuddered. Having an heir was one of the duties he had failed to foresee when contemplating the idea of returning after Naraku's demise. He could press the court into postponing the idea of an heir. However, he understood, to what point would this issue stand. He knew, for the life of a Youkai leader if the western lands, nothing was certain except for death and an heir (A/N it's so weird, the computer insisted that I had to use "an" but won't that make it grammatically incorrect…?).

He glanced towards the window on the left of his room facing the left. Rising high above the Ao Mori, the sun's orange rays dappled the clouded sky. The sun, it reminded him it a girl he had lost so long ago.

---

Rin.

I had never stopped trying to find you.

For four years I had insisted on searching for you although the pitfall of my personality persists that I keep my personal motives a secret from the world.

And sometimes, a secret from myself.

Dare I say that I miss you? I admit that even I am unsure. It probably is the yearning of a master to regain a possession although I daresay the absence of your enigmatic personality has sentenced my life to a duller note. All that remains that obstructs my will to continue searching is what was etched into my soul centuries ago…

---

Sesshomaru looked beyond the Ao Mori forest and into the distance of the east.

---

An unfamiliar scent…

It lingered around the hakama belonging to my father. As intriguing and enigmatic the smell was, it was, nonetheless, that of a human. I was young, a mere six hundred years and was only receiving a glimpse of my future powers with a weakened Doukosso attack. However, my mind was agile enough to understand. Being young, I had not understood the meaning of constraint so, as much as I was ashamed to admit, I was nearly (but not quiet) as hotheaded as the pathetic Hanyou half brother. At least I had better control of my language than the uncouth half-breed.

I was born out of a wedlock meant to save the eastern and western lands from an age-old feud between us and the panther tribe as well as to strengthen the bilateral ties. As much as it annoyed me, my birth was a mere symbol to represent the union of two lands. My father held no feelings for or against my mother and this I both admire and loathe him for. Having no feelings for someone you would "legally impregnate" was impressive yet; my father had the opportunity to gain greater power by strengthening the bond between them to improve the lands.

Nothing more.

Nothing less.

I trailed my father through the courtyard and put in effort to avoid detection. I was lucky and unfortunate at the same time. My father failed to see me but he failed to do so merely because his mind was heavily preoccupied. It could not be matters to do with the state for there were no sounds of war spoke through our walls nor rumors of a coup (I admit! French word!). In situations similar to this, I learned, one should always assume the most improbable outcome and from here, narrow down the different possibilities until you finally get the answer.

His pace had quickened and I was having trouble following him.

Finally, he stopped.

This moment, I would remember forever.

His hair caught in a tight topknot was carried by the wind and he inclined his head, acknowledging the embrace of the wind on his face. His stance was notable and it was also from this moment where I had observed the natural instinct of a leader: his stance that commanded the army.

Unexpectedly, he turned his head slightly.

"Sesshomaru, Youkai and humans are no different."

I stood a distance from him and yet I picked up his whisper that was echoed in the wind.

He nodded his head and turned, transforming into his other form.

I was not obliged to observe the levels of Youki surging around me. I gawked rudely at him. Unable to understand why I was doing so. Was it because I was stunned that he knew I was following him all along, or was it the enigmatic sentence that ended our "confrontation". I could not think.

I stood in silence.

I watched his shadow bound off into the distant backdrop of a mountain whose name I had not known at that time.

For some reason, a single cold object slid smoothly down from the corner of my eye down to faint stripes that made the itching sensation on my cheek worse. I bit my lip; my left fang pierced the flesh of my lip painfully but I was too stunned to realize.

A trickle of blood and tears of no origin mixed on my face.

Then, a palm rested itself on my shoulder.

A smooth female voice saying:

"Sesshomaru, Youkai are better then humans."

---

**Rin's POV**

She sat, quieted under Yuragu's stance.

"Your powers have awoken and you will learn how to tap on that reserve." Yuragu started.

Rin found no need in replying and continued to stare at him. Endan coughed again and she shuddered.

"Do you know what you are capable of?" Endan blurted from the corner. Yuragu ran his hand through his hair.

"Get to the point, please. I do not wish to be in this hut any longer…"

"I understand that your patience is waning but you are not the only none tired. Thus, for the sake of both of us, I will get to the point."

"When you were younger, we took you because we realized that you had a gift. It was a mere feeling back then that hinted of your capacities. However, now, after the training…"

"Yuragu! I do not wish to hear of how I was-" Rin choked

"-Stolen" she whispered. When she was younger, she HAD cried to them to release her back to her lord. Over the years, the will to return had waned and she no longer yearned to be with her master. Like a lost dog (Rin) wanting to return to its master (Sesshomaru): How ironic.

Years later, she had persuaded herself to realize that, Sesshomaru-sama would never return for her. She then began to lie to others that she was an orphan not only to stop attracting attention but also to soothe herself to.

Lies in the past will always turn into a fake memory and you would find yourself tricked by your own lie (A/N It's true). She had not thought about it clearly until Yuragu brought it up today.

"Still at it kid…" Endan lamented

"It's not a lie…" Rin said silently.

"WE understand Rin, however you wish us to view you past, but let me tell you of your powers-"

"IT WAS NOT A LIE!" She shrieked. Her thin voice cracking with emotion, she screamed painfully for all the memories flooding to her of her master. She screamed like a pitiable child whose toy was stolen.

They stole her childhood.

Yuragu stood quietly and rubbed his temple with a finger while Endan fidgeted nervously in the corner. He waited a while for Rin to calm.

"You can transfer emotional hurt and physical hurt to your victim through contact with certain metals." He said quietly. Rin's attention was caught by the sentence and the sound of her harsh breathing momentarily fazed into the dark corners of the hut.

His head rose when he realized that he had caught her attention.

"You see, we are not sure how you have come to possess such a gift but your gift is now real." From a package held by Endan, Yuragu held the whip under a heavy layer of cloth.

"This was the whip, was entwined with faint threads of steal and carbon. Two of the five metals you can use to transfer your energy. For now, shall we describe it as judgment as the attack only occurs when the caster believes it to be rationale? That is perhaps the only setback for such a powerful attack.

He brought the whip closer to he light. A purple wave was resonating from the thick knots.

"This is the extent of your power. After 5 days, the whip still has traces of your damage and thus no one will touch it. This is the so-called coronation of one like you. Your powers erupt suddenly and the user will fall asleep for five days where your soul disperses to further recognize your physical body to the 5 metals.

She was asleep for five days.

"When you awake, you would already be, what we call a Metal-Bender. You are able to transfer all emotional and physical pain to the victim as long as you think that it was fair."

**Sesshomaru's POV**

"Sesshomaru-sama! " Jaken croaked, breaking Sesshomaru from his deep thoughts.

"The court alchemist has confirmed, another Metal-Bender has been created! We MUST find him my Lord! Do you know what you can do with one such rarity?"

Sesshomaru merely looked at Jaken. He turned his head slightly then.

He had heard of them. They were able to destroy armies making use of one of the five metals a Metal-bender could control. He found such an existence of power annoying. The gift of Metal-Bending was passed through the blood of a human with a rare gene selection. Usually a mutation of cells would make one legitimate to be a Metal-Bender. The last Metal-Bender existed during his father's reign and was used against the western lands. The Inu Taisho dispatched of it immediately.

Such a sudden gain of power is extremely annoying.

Sesshomaru mused.

"I am bored Jaken, with the life of an aristocrat. You want to find the Metal-Bender and use him for the Western Lands?"

"Hai…"

"What if he does not belong to the western lands?"

"The alchemist has not told me where the source of the power originated…. Sesshomaru-sama".

" Jaken, I have sensed his birth the moment it happened towards the east. He is not one of us. There is no use in stealing something like that. It would only mean us weak and insignificant. Us, desperate to grab hold of a power to use to our advantage."

"Uh…hai! We would look like helpless fools!"

"This land will not fall under my reign, Jaken!"

"So what will you do, Sesshomaru-sama?"

"I want to see him."

"Hai! I will send scouts for-"

"Jaken."

Jaken paused in the epitome of his great plans for the western lands.

"I wish to find him myself, the Metal-Bender is the most powerful version of a human alive, is it not?"

"Uh… HAI!!" Jaken saluted, not yet understanding what Sesshomaru was indicating.

"I will find him and kill him."

Jaken gawked. His jaw as locked open in a weird expression.

Sesshomaru walked out of the room.

"It has always been at the back of my mind, which is better, Youkai or human?"

END

Ok guys Sorry for the long wait! Please read and review ok? If you have any questions just ask because I don't know if it was too unclear or what. Ok

The next chapter: What will Sesshomaru-sama do with his plan to find him cough her- the metal-bender dededuuuuuuuuuuum, what are Rin's possibilities? Where is the Inu-Tachi????? Aaaaaaaaaaah, sorry guys, you'll have to review and wait for the next chapter cause I'm kinda stumped a to what to write .- oook

Jaa ne!


	10. The Decision I

Yo I'm back! I'm sorry. To atone my long absence, I will give you guys TWO CHAPTERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Heh…. Really sorry. My exams are in 18 days! Bleah, I don't know what I'm doing typing out right now….

**Rin's POV**

Rin sat on the floor and felt its self-contained heat. Heat, which she very happily welcomed in the midst of an icy discussion. She ran her palm through her sweat-soaked hair, stiffly falling back onto her other palm and sat thoughtfully.

Yuragu leaned against the wooden slat walls; his eyes were cold and hard.

"So, Metal-Bender, I have taken the liberty to explain what conditions you must satisfy in order to perfect your gift…"

"You want that, yes? To perfect yourself?" Rin thought for a while before nodding.

"So…" Yuragu murmured, scratching his head with his left hand.

"Where, to start? There are many things that you must know."

"Then I shall ask first." Rin prodded slightly annoyed and aghast. Yuragu perked his head while Endan hacked another cough of unease.

"How do I use my gift?"

"Through the medium of any of the five metals, you can transfer energy to the enemy. The enemy's body usually will not accept such a sudden increase of foreign energy. The muscles and sinew in their bodies will react in different directions towards the charge. Thus, your victim's muscles may rip each other apart and bone's may powder without you even touching him directly."

The atmosphere of the room crept into an even more uncomfortable state of silence: that of which everyone was obligated to say something but nothing was said.

"Thus, the enemy would react with 'self-afflicted' scarring"

Rin took a moment to process the information.

"Kami made all things fair. With such a powerful attack, comes its weakness: Using your ability requires your undivided concentration."

"It would help you considerably if you were to bear an intense grudge towards your enemy or if his name were embedded into the depths of your soul and you know you were born to kill him. Your energy would be brought about faster then."

"With concentration comes the willingness to do so." Rin scowled. The beads of sweat rolled down her cheek, ceremoniously graced by the golden candlelight falling on to her lap.

"Thus, I can say that your attack would only occur if you felt that what you were about to do was kami's will. Or, if you have the concentration of a snake."

Yuragu paused and looked at Rin who was clearly mesmerized by what she had just been told.

"And thus, Kami no Sekai no Handanryuku (A/N The Earthly Judgment of God) is the traditional name of the Metal-Benders."

Rin sat silently. She had understood her purpose.

"Yuragu." She said softly.

Under the dim light, Yuragu's aquamarine eyes still flashed with the light against it.

Rin looked down at her hands that emitted an eerie purple glow.

"I am a great source of power, I can feel myself pulsating with it." Yuragu kneeled down opposite Rin.

Rin's jaw trembled while Yuragu ran an uneasy finger through his hair.

She had understood.

He twitched and lifted a quivering left palm to her moist cheek.

"That would mean… I must leave to negate our detection."

Rin looked up at Yuragu and the soft candlelight illuminated both their faces. Yuragu did not expect her to arrive at the conclusion before he. His eyes widened when Rin's filled with the pearlescent glimmer of tears.

"I don't want to be abandoned again."

**Sesshomaru's POV**

This is all so irritating.

I feel perturbed. It has been five years since I have last used any of my skills and now, I start to feel and hear the song of my bones as I live my days.

How old am I actually…. I could say nine hundred and thirty-five, which of course is not considered old. In fact, I would be in my prime age about two or three centuries from now where I would then learn another technique.

I feel, nonetheless weathered and unused.

It pesters me, like the presence of a festering corpse at the back of my mind. The swarm of flies is now too thick and I am obligated to do something about my lack of exercise.

I need to move around.

If anything irks me, destroy it.

No wonder I was named Sesshomaru- Destruction of the life circle, or, the perfect destruction.

We are of what our name depicts. I think I will fulfill the legacy once more.

I walked towards my resting area to search for my pauldron I haven't worn it since the day I had entered the court of my fathers.

My resting area, simplistic yes, but I prefer not to tie myself to a common resting area. I prefer to sleep in the shaded quadrangle, where I have slept centuries ago as a pup. Below our Goshinboku tree which has been in existence for as long as the western lands have been established.

The tree of the times:

I felt good sitting beneath its ancient branches. It reminded me that I was not alone in my conquest. Surely, a tree that has stood alone for the eons and seen the evolution of our lands and people had history far more ancient than all of us.

I reached my pauldron, placed neatly on a low wooden desk. With my left arm hacked off (I don't even want to think of the person who did so), I had to find other means of wearing the heavy bone plate that carried the weight of the transformed Testsusaiga and the weight of my ancestor's work.

The pauldron signified our conquest of the western lands over other smaller tribes of Youkai, and wearing it could be comparing it to I carrying the weight of my ancestors sowing.

Of course, wielding Tenseiga- or Testusaiga would be just as good…

END

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Love you all

Shinjiteru Hikari


	11. The Decision II

Huuuh… I'm sorry guys. What can I say? I'm a lousy author. Hehe, their meeting draws nearer. The next chapter? Who knows…. Even I don't D

Cross Roads

"aaiieieiee! Kagome-Chan!"

The near serene view of the Sengoku Jidai changed from that of a romantic feeling to the reality of a woman living in that time.

A plumped Sango hobbled over towards Kagome, Inuyasha and their toddler Daiki. At first, she was unrecognizable due to her swollen belly and the absence of her Youkai-Taijiya uniform. All that remained of their friend was the familiar fringe and her persistence to reach them despite her swollen ankles.

"Uh… Sango-Chan!" Kagome returned the call and ran to meet Sango half the way.

The closer the two friends were, the more they realized the difference a year and motherhood had on them. Their faces showed the strain of discipline and constraint, also the faint and impending wrinkles of early aging brought by children. Sango rested, panting faintly and supporting her back with her arms. They looked at each other in silence for a long time… Silence can convey the most words and the hardest expressions especially after a long separation.

The steady silence was broken by Inuyasha's loud and intended yawn and the harassed cry of Miroku yelling for Sango.

Shortly after…

They managed to settle shortly into the square hut of Sango, Miroku and their sprightly daughter, Sayuri whom Daiki had a strange interest in. Both Kagome and Sango showed the signs of motherhood almost too visibly thru the lines on their faces. Only Miroku and Inuyasha remained the least unchanged.

"Kagome-Chan, a new metal-bender has been born not far from here."

Kagome's face kept it's confused expression but Inuyasha's ears perked up.

"Yeah…? So?' he tested Sango.

She calmly turned to the hanyou and started.

"Not only that, the western lands are going on a massive power struggle. This Taisho is trying to grab power from your brother."

Inuyasha snarled.

"So what. I don't care for that idiot."

Kagome shot Inuyasha a glare and reached over to separate Daiki from his odd tussle with Sayuri.

Miroku cut in while Sango tried to separate their children " The thing is that we heard from Kaede-sama who's old friend resides in the western friends that Sesshoumaru intends to kill the metal bender. The news is pretty old since that guy's always looking for something to kill…"

"What's this got to do with us?" Inuyasha blurted. A perplexed expression plastered on his face.

Sango gave a sigh in dismay.

"Time can't change some things…" she murmured.

"We thought you would be able to smell it Inuyasha. The metal." Miroku said bluntly.

"The Metal-bender is heading this way and can't you smell the wind Inuyasha? The Youki is strong! Sesshoumaru and the metal-bender may meet in the middle of that forest!" Miroku pointed dramatically.

Kagome remained silent. She did not think that Inuyaha would pick up the scent that fast. In Tokyo with all the cars and buildings, metal was just one of things that the air smelt of. This was probably why Inuyasha was unable to pick it out.

**Rin's POV**

"Yes, Rin. You may be forced to leave the village, you pose as a threat to our secret existence."

He continued despite Rin's visible trembling.

"This sudden outburst of energy will attract many Daiyoukai. You're even starting to unsettle some of us…" Yuragu shifted his weight uncomfortably.

Rin stared blankly at his shadow formed by the weak candlelight. She held back her tears and the unnatural but familiar pain spread through her nose.

"-But you don't want that?" Yuragu continued. Rin stopped and listened.

"There ARE ways to contain your powers. The most typical way is to train over a long duration to gain enough experience to control it."

"Of course, that would be too tedious." Yuragu sounded almost hinting something in his tone of voice. Rin did not appreciate his holding back of information and she once again sincerely felt alone against one who was so used to ulterior motives. She had never felt this strange unease with Sesshomaru-sama. She could exist in his presence and understand that although she may never have been told of his true actions, she could always affirm that he would return to her always. It could not be told as trustworthiness or loyalty. Perhaps some hidden attribute too great to be put in words, an attribute that Sesshomaru-sama had and Yuragu lacked.

" You could also SUPRESS this by wielding the katana of a dai-youkai."

Rin's eyes widened as much as her gaze intensified on Yuragu's shadow. The air smelt metallic and Endan's copper belt emitted an interesting hum that both soothed her but warned her.

"Ex-Shitatsupa, Rin, I entrust you with your first mission. After minimal training, you will be set upon finding a dai-youkai. It is not necessary to kill it but your task would be harder than stealing its life."

Dai-youkai…. Rin gulped.

" Stealing the katana that signifies his status and power is harder than massacre. Many Youkai-lords would never give up their katana."

Yuragu looked down.

"I have a feeling that this mission would force you to recall-" he coughed uneasily

" I won't announce your mission and you may leave when you deem the time right. Just tell me when you are leaving this village so that I can listen for you from the forests. I will hear you if you call me and I will come to your aid."

Rin nodded sadly.

Her first mission, her first time out of the village and her first job: finding a dai-youkai. Was fate aiding her or had it also an ulterior motive? Fate was never with her but she always had an accurate glimpse of its plans for her.

And some how, Sesshomaru-sama was involved somewhere along the line.

**Sesshomaru's POV**

Sesshomaru frowned. It was the deep scowl that he rarely presented. The last IT had shown itself was the day he realized he could never have the Tenseiga.

He was obviously in a dangerous mood.

The Taisho Tatsuyuama… Sesshomaru pictured his face and silently cut his image up slowly with his imaginary Doukosso.

He was good at this.

He had clearly stated his mission was to be carried out alone. Tatsuyama had done what could be called an unofficial act of rebellion. Having volunteered to follow Sesshomaru when it was made so clear that Sesshomaru was to go alone AND gaining the permission of the court to do so, Tatsuyama had unknowingly (or purposely) put himself in a competition of power against Sesshomaru.

It was a very smart political move.

Behind the simple and pretentious action of volunteering to come along: Tatsuyama had merely declared outright that he was attempting to go against Sesshomaru and challenged his power. Also, with the matter being that of searching for the metal-bender, it meant that he was doubted Sesshomaru's power in being able to protect the western lands.

Obviously Tatsuyama would try to preserve the metal-bender and convince the court that destroying the metal-bender would be a disadvantage to the western-lands. He would successfully have displaced Sesshomaru from his position of respect.

Sesshomaru could not say anything. Half the court agreed with Tatsuyama and the preservation of the metal-bender. His frown deepened. They did not think that he was capable of protecting them. They had never seen what he had done to Naraku-

Sesshoumaru coughed.

Tatsuyama had the support of the people.

Sesshomaru had the blood of his fathers.

Sesshomaru closed his eyes. He had only one chance.

Destroy the metal-bender BEFORE Tatsuyama and by doing so reclaim the respect of the court. Tatsuyama had obviously been doing a lot of work. Jaken also seemed swayed by the offer of a leader (or idol) who recognized his followers.

However, a look at Sesshomaru-sama's Tenseiga renewed his loyalty.

Sesshomaru swore silently.

His blood had better help him now.

**Rin's POV**

Rin sat silently in her hut. A sense of trepidation crept slowly up her back. The feeling of it made her stomach churn in revulsion. Her Naginata sang to her in the corner of the hut from the shadows. She could hear its distinct metallic ring resonate throughout the room. Ever since her powers had awaken, Metals from swords, armory and even from the nails from the walls of the village called out to her. She heard everyone of their mingled "voices" and was frequently unsettled by the constant humming and buzzing. It was not as bad now. Only her Naginata sang to her in the solace of her raised hut that was, thankfully, made entirely out of wood.

Rin could not bear to remain in the armory rooms of the village longer than an afternoon as the constant ringing and crying of well-used swords and weapons bewildered her. Yuragu had told her that Metal-benders tend to feel skittish after they have just realized their powers.

She coughed at Yuragu's name and Rin realized that she was angry with him. She strongly felt that her current dilemma was a result of his choice to bring her in how many years ago-

Rin paused and drew in a sharp breath. She had forgotten how long she had been living here. She gaped in horror and scoured her mind searching for a number to take the place of "how many". Rin cried in anguish.

"Ah" Her frustrations gnawed at her. The frustrations were built up from her years of residing here without someone to truly care for her.

Rin paused yet again.

"without someone truly caring for me" she mouthed slowly.

Yuragu was a companion and her team of Naginata wielders treated her kindly. However, in her long stay here, she lacked a mentor. Rin thought over the word Mentor. The word rolled over her mind again and again- it was like the waves of the oceans in the east that she saw once with Sesshoumaru-sama.

Rin tried remembering his face but the image was not summoned easily. She was not surprised at this. He had long ago ceased to appear easily. A low and soft murmur fell from Rin's lips.

Perhaps not Mentor… something else.

She turned her head to the window and tried separating her tumultuous emotions. When she realized it was useless, she got up with her Naginata and headed for the door. She did not want to tell Yuragu that she was leaving the village now. If she were in trouble-

She laughed.

"Sesshoumaru-sama will save me." She snorted. The more aggressive and cunning Rin took over the moment she stepped out of her hut. She needed to be strong to find her sword. The sword would ensure that she would be able to stay in this village for a very long time.

"I don't care if I have to take it from HIM." And she walked into the forest toward the falling autumn sun.

**Sessshouamaru POV**

I will leave before the Taisho. He will catch up with me no doubt but this early head start would allow me to get days closer to my target. I want to kill the Metal-bender. This is like a hunting sport.

I allow my final jaw-popping yawn before assuming the usual stoic face.

I then walk into the direction of the forests where the interestingly metallic smell draws closer.


End file.
